


The Robin Hood Effect

by CeleryThesis



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-23
Updated: 2014-11-16
Packaged: 2018-02-18 10:29:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 24,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2345132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CeleryThesis/pseuds/CeleryThesis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU.   Regina Mills is a high school principal in Boston.  She meets pub owner Robin Locksley when they serve on a jury together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**August**

 

Regina was ready to throw herself at the mercy of the judge.  The attorneys were clearly close to making their final picks, and no matter how many eye-rolls and how much hostility she was throwing at them, they seemed determined to ~~ruin her day~~ pick her for this jury.

"Your honor," she stood up and spoke in a bold voice.

"Ms..." the judge looked to his clerk, who whispered _Mills_. "Ms. Mills," his tone did not suggest he had any interest in what she was going to say, but she ventured on.

"Your honor, I am the head principal at Northeast.  We have only been in school four days; I'm sorry, but it's impossible for me to be out this early in the year.  If you want to reschedule me for a school break, I would be happy to show up then." She looked him in the eye.  He seemed amused.

"Sit down, Ms. Mills.  You're not excused."

She sat.  _Fuck_ she muttered under her breath.

"Nice try," the guy next to her whispered in a British accent.  Regina looked over.  He was gingery with scruffy facial hair. He was  wearing jeans and a Celtics t-shirt with a ratty green plaid button down, rolled up at the elbows.  He had very worn black Converse Chuck Taylors.  He was the height of college boy fashion circa 1992.  Regina noticed he had a English looking lion tattoo on his forearm. She assessed him to be about her age and therefore at least five years too old to pull off this get-up. She aggressively ignored him and pulled out her phone to text her vice principal.

 **Mills** :  Looks like I'm stuck.  Text me if ANYTHING comes up.

 **Swan** :  Yes, Ma'am.  Have fun. :P

Regina rolled her eyes for the fifteenth time that day and stowed her phone in her bag before it was confiscated.

One more lucky bastard was excused, and the jury was complete.  Twelve miserable folks and two alternates.  It was supposed to be a one day trial.  Two preppy, privileged looking teenagers were charged with sexual assault.  Because teenagers are fundamentally stupid, there were at least four cell phone videos of the attack.  The defense team had already implored the judge to make the proceedings quick, as one defendant was supposed to start his freshman year at Stanford, and the other at Vanderbilt. If they were acquitted, they planned to fly out immediately.

Regina sighed and opened her court issued notebook, got out her favorite pen and focused her attention on the prosecutor's opening statement.  He was obviously smart but not well-spoken.  Regina could feel the attention in the box waning.  Still, it seemed pretty open and shut.  The girl was obviously passed out; there was no way she had given consent.  Regina didn't think this would take very long after all.

The prosecutor sat and the defense attorney took his turn.  He was smoother by far than his colleague on the other side. There was another video from earlier in the night, this time with the victim already quite drunk and draped over one of the defendants.  Regina realized that the victim was going to be questioned aggressively about her own behavior. Regina shuddered with disgust.  The man sitting next to her murmured something in solidarity.

The first few witnesses for the prosecution were straight forward--it was clear that sexual activity had occurred. Then it was the victim's turn to take the stand. She seemed much younger than the two defendants although she really wasn't; she would be a senior this year.  Regina was familiar with the school all of the parties in this case attended.  It was in the wealthiest neighborhood in Boston, and was considered the best public high school.  Regina's school was its polar opposite in every way.

The victim was very soft-spoken and seemed terrified. The judge had to ask her to speak up several times. She didn't remember the attack, but she had woken up on a bedroom floor at the house where this party had taken place without her underwear and in pain from sexual trauma.  After she had gotten home, one of her friends had sent her a video of the attack.  She went straight to her parents--Regina was impressed by this--and they took her to the ER immediately where a rape kit was performed. She testified about being harassed by friends of the defendants for "ruining their lives."  She had convinced her parents to home-school her for her last year of high school to avoid having to go back. The prosecutor turned her over.  The man beside Regina groaned quietly under his breath.

The defense attorney wasn't outright hostile towards the young women, but he was patronizing and made her watch the first video again and again, trying to solicit the answers he wanted.  Regina was seething for the prosecutor to object more, but he was relatively quiet. Even the judge seemed taken aback at the lack of aggressiveness from the prosecutor.  The defense didn't grill her about what she was wearing--Regina doubted the judge would have allowed that line of questioning--but he did everything to make her feel foolish and responsible for the proceeding events. By the end, Regina was so angry she could feel fire building inside of her aching to come out through her very fingers.

The prosecution attempted precious little rebuttal and then rested.  The defense brought in character witness after witness, peers, parents, teachers, coaches, all expressing verbosely how wonderful the boys were.  Top students. Great athletes.  All-around stellar human beings.  The defendants declined to testify, so both sides were ready to close before lunch.  The prosecutor continued his weak performance and the defense attorney oozed oil all over the courtroom.  The judge told them he would give instructions after lunch and excused them.

Regina ducked into a semi-open conference room.  She pulled out her phone, laptop and lunch, and texted Swan immediately.

 **Mills** :  How is it?

 **Swan** :  Quiet morning.

 **Mills** :  DON'T SAY THAT!

 **Swan** :  Ha, ha! Seriously, it's fine.

Regina struggled to get her assistant's sense of humor, but at least the school wasn't burning down in her absence.  She opened her laptop to work on a grant proposal she had spent most of yesterday writing.  There was no available wifi in the court house, so she edited her previous work although what she really needed to do was research.  She ate her usual lunch:  turkey sandwich, apple, fun sized Snickers and water. She got carried away enough that she was surprised when she saw jurors filing back into their room.  She took a last bite of the apple, threw away her trash, and joined them.  The bailiff led them back into court.

The judge's instructions were brief and expected, and very soon they were entering the jury room again.  One man wanted to be the foreman, and no one objected, so that was easy.  Regina was seated next to the English guy again.  They took a preliminary vote, which was six to six.  English guy snorted in disgust.

The foreman spoke up, "Do you have something more constructive to add?" Regina rolled her eyes. Oh lord, one of those.

"Yes," the man said, his tone of controlled anger.  "There was clearly no consent before the attack.  She was passed out, ferchrissake, how could it be anything other than sexual assault?"

"But in the other video," an older woman sitting across from them asserted, "she seemed like she was loving the attention she was getting.  How were the boys supposed to know she changed her mind?"

By not having sex with a lifeless body, Regina thought.  She imagined a couple of her students, her young men, in the place of the defendants.  They would probably be in prison already. She held her tongue for the time being.  Her English compatriot was making her arguments, anyway. He went through the evidence piece by piece.  He hadn't taken any notes, like Regina had, but his memory was excellent.  Regina wished he had been the prosecutor. One of the other jurors, an older man sitting next to the foreman, disputed a fact that the English man had stated. Regina pulled out her notes and corroborated her neighbor's account. The man didn't concede, but two jurors switched their votes to guilty, leaving it eight to four. 

The foreman spoke up, "I don't mean to offend you," always a fantastic way to start, "But your accent...are you a citizen? How are you on this jury?"

Regina gave her best eye-roll of the day. 

"I got my citizenship years ago.  I've been a voter ever since," the man said calmly.  The jury decided it was a good time for a break.  Regina stepped out to find a bathroom, and the English man approached her.

"Thanks for your help in there," he smiled.

"Oh sure.  I really thought it would be twelve to nothing right off."

"I saw the way some were looking at the girl; I figured it would be a fight."

Regina just shook her head.

"Robin Locksley," he said and offered his hand.

"Regina Mills." She took it and his touch sent a bit of a jolt through her. He had very blue eyes.  "Well, I have to find a bathroom before we start back," smooth Mills, truly impressive.

"It's just through there," Robin pointed down the hall.

"Thanks."

 Back in the jury room the debate continued.  They were down to only two not guilty votes, but those were digging in. 

"I tell you, I just don't fell right ruining those boys' lives when we're not really sure what happened, and what she wanted."

That was enough for Regina.  All the rage bottled inside of her the whole day was boiling to the top.  With the voice and presence that had made her the youngest head principal in the district and on the fast track to being superintendent, she rose from her seat and said in a thundering voice, "Did you not hear the first thing Mr. Locksley said today? She was passed out.  She could not consent.  It was assault; it was rape.  We all saw the video.  By not recognizing it for what it was, we are complicit in the RAPE of that girl."  She glared at the two hold-outs.  "Surely you have wives, daughters, granddaughters and nieces.  What is difficult about this for you to UNDERSTAND?" She sat.  Within fifteen minutes they were unanimous for conviction.  They filled out the forms and alerted the bailiff. 

Regina stared the defendants down when the verdicts were read.  She had a slight smirk on her face that she hoped they could see; contempt that she hoped they could feel.  They were led in shackles to be processed.  Regina had no doubt that they would be out on bond until sentencing, but the judge made it clear that they were not to leave the state.  Stanford and Vandy would have to wait.

Regina gathered her things.  "Ms. Mills?" The English voice was quiet next to her.

"Regina.  Yes?"  She looked up at him and he seemed a little nervous and a little sheepish.

"My pub is only a few blocks from here.  Will you come back with me for a drink?"

Of course she wouldn't.  She was racing back to school to do all the work she should have done today and to get caught up on everything she missed.  She would probably be there until nine.  But...she wanted to. Shockingly, she would love to go with him to his pub and spend the rest of the afternoon finding out about him and drinking beer. 

"I have to get back to work," she said with palpable regret.

"Can I get your number then?"

Regina hesitated.  She wanted to, for sure, but should she?  Oh, what the hell.  She passed over her phone to him and took his in her hands.  She programmed in the right number and listed it under...just Regina.  It was the most impulsive thing she'd done in at least a year, probably more.

"It was really nice meeting you," he said as they exited the building.

"You, too, Robin."  They headed in different directions to pub and school, and for the first time since she was fifteen, Regina hoped that this boy would call her soon.


	2. Chapter 2

**September**

At 5:30 on the dot, Regina's secretary left her desk to clock out, sending a quick pleasantry for Regina to have a good weekend and practically skipped out the door.

"You, too."  Regina shut her door and quickly changed her clothes. This was the one Friday night through November that Northeast didn't have a football game she had to attend--that she loved to attend, of course.  She pulled on a purple t-shirt with St. Francis printed boldly in the front in gold letters and then zipped up her jacket so no one would see it on the way to the parking lot.  Her desk was immaculate; if there was work on her desk, it wasn't time to leave.  She grabbed her bag and headed out the door to her Accord in its assigned spot.  Ms. Mills has left for the weekend.  

St. Francis aside, she was dressed typically for Friday night:  jeans, low-heeled black boots and black leather jacket.  Usually, her shirt was royal blue with green letters, and occasionally throw-back green with blue letters, but every fall Friday she was at some high school football game, usually watching her Northeast Eagles get trounced.  Last year on bye week, she drank an entire bottle of wine in the bathtub.  This year, Henry was a freshman at St. Francis and in the band, so out to the suburbs to yet another high school football game she would go.

But not alone.

She made the short drive to _The Major Oak_ and pulled in, clicking on her alarm as it was in a bit of a sketchy neighborhood.  She entered the pub, which was in the midst of its Friday night bustle.  The stool she had been occupying for the last few Saturday nights was empty, though.  She sat down as the bartender Little John (who was, of course, at least three hundred pounds) greeted her.

"Regina!  Robin's back with the grill. He's been working on something for you. Beer?"

"Would love one, but I had better wait until after the game. Water with lime?"

Just then, Robin burst through the double doors at the back of the bar.  He saw her, and she could have sworn his face lit up, which was great because she was sure hers did to.

"Hi!" He said and leaned over the bar to kiss her on the cheek. "I have some grilled chicken and squash, and I made spinach salads for us. I set aside a booth," he pointed to a corner table.

"Great, do you want me to help bring it out?"

"No, take your drink and get settled.  I'll be right out."

Regina settled in at the booth and looked around the pub.  It looked like mostly downtown workers drinking beer and watching soccer.  Robin only worked late on Saturday nights, which tended to be more college students and varying quality local bands.  Robin had no free time away from the pub, so she had come here instead of going on dates.  He wasn't free on Friday nights usually because of his four year old son, Roland, but tonight Roland was sleeping over with Little John's son, and Robin and Regina were actually going to spend time together outside the doors of this pub.  Not that she hadn't enjoyed these Saturday nights.  She brought her iPad and caught up on her running blogs--what she would be doing at home any way--but Robin usually had lots of time to chat and the bands were entertaining if not always fantastic. She would sip on a beer, and every so often Robin would dump it for a fresh one.  It was fun, and that wasn't a word Regina applied to her life very often, at least with things not involving Henry.

Robin arrived with the plates.

"Wow, this looks amazing." Regina realized she was starving. She had patrolled the cafeteria for all three lunch periods today after there had been more than the usual rowdiness in the school entry process that morning.  She'd had a budget meeting right after and had never gotten around to actually eating.  She took a bite of the chicken--it was a thigh on the bone--and groaned in pleasure.  There was a kitchen in the pub that served a limited pub fare menu, but Robin liked to grill in the alley for Regina and staff.  The squash was the first fall produce she had tasted.  Robin had brushed a butter sauce on top.  Regina loved to eat but was not an adventurous cook.  This was one more sign that her friendship with Robin, or whatever it was, was the best thing that had happened to her in a while.

They hadn't kissed yet.  He would walk her to her car and give her a full-body hug that would leave her aching for more, but perhaps he didn't want their first kiss to be in a parking lot.  She was tempted to down a beer or two and then lay one on him herself, but she had to be responsible with alcohol.  Getting a DWI would not only be morally reprehensible, it would end her career.  She had never been timid with men.  For some reason, though, this one was different. He texted her little snippets all day long.  She rarely had time to respond beyond a smile, but they would have full texting conversations in the evenings after he put Roland to bed. She had learned that Robin had grown up in Nottingham, England.  He played football all his life, and while he wasn't good enough to make a professional team, he _had_ been good enough to be offered a soccer scholarship at Boston College. He earned a degree in business and worked in bars until he saved enough to open his own place. 

She had never met Roland, but he sent her pictures of him.  He was a beautiful boy with curly brown hair and huge brown eyes.  He actually looked nothing like his father, except Regina recognized they had some of the same expressions. Of course, it made her unbearably curious about his mother.

They had discussed everything under the sun--except for the most personal things, the difficult, important things.  She had no idea what the situation was with Roland's mother.  She also hadn't shared her personal history, beyond telling him who Henry was to her.

"So, does Henry call you Grandma?"

"NO! He calls me Regina."

Regina finished up her meal, and Robin quickly cleared the plates.  It should be about a thirty minute drive, but Friday traffic could be a problem, so Regina wanted to get an early start.  She turned the key in the Accord, and as NPR popped on, she offered to let him plug in his phone for music, which he did. Regina was nervous for Robin to meet Henry, and because her former step-daughter and son-in-law would no doubt be at the game.  She took a deep, cleansing breath and plunged in.

"So...Henry is my ex-step-grandson, like I told you."

"Yeah," Robin looked at her with a non-judgmental, encouraging face.

"I had a brief, terrible, mistake of a marriage a few years ago--I guess six years ago--Henry was eight at the time and now he's fourteen.  Leo was much older than me.  I met him just after his wife died.  He was in no way ready to move on, and I was too naive and infatuated to recognize it.  It seemed like a big romantic dream at the time."  She stared at the road for a few minutes.  Robin didn't jump in with his thoughts.  It was a nice, comfortable silence.  She wasn't familiar with the band that was playing on Robin's phone, but it was pleasant.

"He was miserable from just about day one, and I wasn't far behind.  It was a disaster; we were separated after two months." Again Regina let her thoughts fill the car in silence.

"But Henry came into my life because of it, and he's been the best thing in it.  My life." She had a water bottle in the cup holder, and she took a long drink.

"And his parents?"

"Leo's daughter Mary Margaret and her husband David.  Hated me at first sight. I am exactly eighteen months older than Mary Margaret, so I get it.  They are very good, very earnest people.  I would be amazed if either of them have ever had an original, compelling thought.  But they are good parents, and they allow Henry and me to have a relationship." She looked at Robin.  "Not that it matters, but Henry was adopted. That doesn't affect the way they feel about him, and it's not worth mentioning except that it maybe explains why his personality is...different from theirs.  But anyway, they are very good, and they've been trying to adopt a second child for years, and every time there is some unbelievably heart-breaking...thing...that happens at the last minute and ruins it for them.  And my ex-husband has stage four prostate cancer, too, so they have to deal with that.  And I'm a complete bitch because in spite of all of that, I'd rather eat glass than have to spend more than five minutes with them.  Luckily, the feeling is quite mutual."

"So you see Henry...?"

"He comes up on the train at least once a month.  We always go out to eat, and we used to go to museums and cultural stuff until both of us were sick to death of culture and had seen every historical site in a fifty mile radius.  Then we started going to movies. I've seen every super hero movie in the last two years, hey, I always have something to talk to the students about. Then I drive him home.  And we text all the time.  In fact lately, I've been texting you both at the same time, and I just know they're going to get mixed up." Regina laughed. "I told him you were coming with me tonight," the way Robin had listened to her had given her the courage to tell him that.  He smiled.

"I'm looking forward to meeting him.  And I haven't been to an American football game since college."

"The team they're playing killed us last week.  But I have no idea how good Henry's high school is."

They had to park quite a way down a hill from the stadium.  It was getting dark already.  Robin put his arm around her as they walked in, and she leaned into him.  He smelled like the pub, but also of soap and grill.  It was not unpleasant.  He paid for their tickets at the box office, and they found the right side.  Regina spotted Henry immediately.  At his Catholic boys' high school, they had a jazz band that stayed in the stands.  No marching, no uniforms beyond matching shirts, no silly hats.  Regina loved the band at her school, but she could see this was much more Henry's style.  The band was playing as Robin and Regina climbed the steps of the stadium, and they found seats close enough to be able to watch Henry play his trumpet.  He caught Regina out of the corner of his eye, and raised his eyebrow at her as if to say, _so that's him_.  Regina looked back.  _Yep_. She took a few pictures of Henry with her phone, trying to be sneaky enough not to embarrass him.

The other team was too good for the St. Francis Rockets, and by the end of the first quarter, the Rockets were down by fourteen.

"I should probably go say hello to Mary Margaret and David."

"You probably should.  Do you want me to stay here?"

"No, come on. It will give us something to talk about, and if it's awkward, well, it always is anyway."

She led the way down a few rows.  She had been staring at the back of Mary Margaret's boyishly chic pixie cut all evening, so she knew exactly where they were sitting.

"Hello, Mary Margaret.  David." She could tell by their reaction that they had seen her, too.

"Oh, hi, Regina," Mary Margaret said with admirably convincing warmth.

"This is my friend Robin Locksley.  Robin this is Mary Margaret Nolan.  David Nolan."  Everyone shook hands. 

"The band is great!" Robin offered, bless him.

"Yeah, they work really hard.  Thanks for coming down to see him."

"Of course," Regina said and plastered her eyes in front to keep them from rolling.  Because it would be much worse than if she didn't, she braced herself for the reaction and asked, "How's Leo doing?"

Mary Margaret looked at her incredulously, "He's dying, Regina."

"He's in a lot of pain," David said scoldingly.  Yes, let's pretend that Leo was the injured party in the whole sordid affair, and that Regina had practically left him in his death bed.  In reality, he had left _her_ and had gotten sick five years later.  The high road, the high road, I'm going to take the high road, Regina sang in her head.

"I'm so sorry to hear that.  He's lucky to have you two to take care of him."

Mary Margaret softened slightly.  "Henry's planning to come up tomorrow."

"Yes, I can't wait," Regina said truthfully.  "Well, I guess we'll head back up."

"It was very nice to meet you," Robin did handshakes round two, and they returned to their seats.

Henry had half-time off and scooted over to Regina and Robin.  There were much more comfortable introductions, and the three decided to check out the concession stand.

"I saw you talking to Mom and Dad," Henry poked her in the side.  "Were you nice?"

"I was so nice!"

"Yeah, right." Henry teased her.

Robin paid for drinks and popcorn, and they were walking down the concourse when Regina spotted Superintendent Gold with his flowing hair and his cane.  She turned immediately, hoping he hadn't seen her.

"Ms. Mills?"

Fuck.

"Superintendent."

"So nice to see you out supporting Boston Public Schools," he side-eyed her St. Francis shirt and Henry's Rocket Band one.  Gold hated her, she could tell, but he was always chillingly polite.  She was after his job.  She'd never declared it openly, but she was, and he knew it.  Her school was quickly becoming one of the better ones in the district under her leadership, and she was being acknowledged not only in the school community but also in the press for the work she was doing at Northeast.  It made him look good, too, but it also made him uneasy because he was smart.  She said the only thing she could think of to throw him off course.

"Yeah, Northeast had a bye this week, so it was the perfect opportunity to come see my grandson play in his band." She looked him dead in the eye.

"Come on, Grandma, I don't want to miss the third quarter," Henry said perfectly.

"And hey, it looks like Boston Public Schools is going to win this one!" Regina patted Gold's arm as they passed.

"His face," Henry snickered.

"So that's your boss?" Robin asked her.

"Yes, he's delightful, but let's not talk about him any more."

The Rockets never recovered, which gave Regina and Robin time to talk the whole second half.

"You talk like your marriage was some scandalous thing," Robin looked at her kindly.  "Everyone is allowed a disastrous relationship or two."

 _Oh if you only knew_ , thought Regina. But one tale of woe was enough from her.

"My marriage ended badly, too." He had linked his arm through hers and was rubbing his thumb languidly over her thigh.  It was making her whole lower half warm, but she was obviously interested in what he was going to say.

"Roland's mother?"

"Yeah.  Marian.  She's younger than me, quite a bit actually.  She was a music student who sang in a band that used to play in the pub a lot.  She had an arsehole boyfriend, and I somehow got in the middle of it and threw him out for good.  I'd always been attracted to her, so it's not like my motives were entirely pure."

Regina hated her instantly.

"Anyway, we fell into this fast relationship, and I realized rather immediately that she wasn't entirely well, and that she was quite fragile.  The smallest things would throw her off, and she wouldn't be able to get out of bed.  But when she felt good, she was amazing.  She was kind, she was supportive; we did everything together.  And she got pregnant.  And we got married. And the pregnancy was very hard on her, but she made it through. She was stronger! It was the greatest thing for a while. She decided she wanted to go back to school to get teaching credentials and teach music.  She's local, and her parents are around, and they helped out with Roland tremendously--they still do, that's where he stays on Saturday nights--and by the time he was two, she was almost finished.  She did her student teaching at an elementary school.  And it was a disaster, and she fell apart, and she left."

"What happened?"

"She said she couldn't do it.  She said the kids ran all over her.  She said she was told it wasn't going to work."

Regina had given that speech many times in her career.  The people who were truly meant to be teachers stuck around and got better.  The weak ones and the ones wholly unsuited for the profession quit. She supposed that seemed harsh, but in her experience it was much better to deal with issues head-on.

"She left? Is she living with her parents?" Regina realized this was unlikely as she said it.  Nothing had indicated that Roland had a mother in his life.

"No, she really left.  We have no idea where she is.  Every so often, Roland gets a card from Phoenix or San Francisco or some other place.  Her parents hired someone to find her, which he did, and then reported back that she was safe but didn't want to be found."

"Well, that's awful.  But Roland..."

"Roland barely remembers her.  Her parents try to talk about her with him, but he's not very interested.  We all do the best we can."

"That's obvious." She wrapped her hand around his that was still on her leg and put her head on his shoulder.

They left five minutes early to avoid traffic, waving to Henry on the way out.  Robin took her hand. By the time they made it down the hill, most of the other out of the way parkers had left.  He stopped and looked at her, gripping her hand tightly.  He's nervous, Regina thought, just as Robin finally went in for the kiss. So much for her parking lot theory. Shyness gone, Regina put her arms around him and kissed him back.  She had an overwhelming urge to throw him in the backseat of the Accord and have at it right there, but being caught having sex in her car in the Catholic school parking lot by her boss gave her pause. Instead, she kissed him one more time and headed for the driver's side.

"We could go back for beers at the pub," Robin suggested, "or beers at my apartment." He looked straight ahead.

Regina wasn't sure she wanted to invade Roland's territory, even though he was gone for the evening.

"I don't have any beer but I have a bottle of wine at my place," she said quietly.

"That's the best idea."

They listened to his music again on the way back.  Regina was nervous but happy.  Robin was brushing his hand up and down her leg shooting bolts of warmth throughout her.

She pulled into the space in front of her condo, and they made their way up the stairs.  Regina was momentarily grateful that the cleaning lady had been there earlier, but that was the last coherent thought she had for a while. As soon as they were in the door, Robin picked her up with one arm wrapped around her and one hand under her ass.  She was used to taking charge in these situations, but he didn't even give her time.  He backed her up against the wall in her entry way and kissed her while holding her up and removing both of their jackets.  _He is really good_. 

"Bedroom?"

"That way," she answered.

He put her down and pulled her t-shirt over her head.  She was wearing a lacy bra more suited to her earlier attire.

"That's beautiful," he whispered in her ear in his English way that made her knees wobble.  She took his hand and led him in. She pulled off her boots and jeans and watched him undress.  He still had that soccer player's body.  He picked her up again--really he wasn't that much bigger than she was, but he picked her up like she was tiny.  It was not something she had experienced before.  He lay her gently on the bed and started kissing down her body, pausing at the bra, running his hands all over it, finally removing it and then taking each breast in his mouth, which made her toes curl.  She reached down into his boxers, his cock hard and ready, and he groaned. She pulled his face back up and kissed him, wrapping her legs around him.  She let him take her underwear off and then practically begged him, non-verbally, but still.

He placed his hand on her and felt for himself how ready she was.  He reached over for his pants pocket and a condom and then entered her with a moan and kept his hand on her, rubbing her as he thrust.  Regina threw her head back and tried not to come yet.  She wanted this to go on for a while.  But she had been on the edge since he was rubbing her leg at the stadium, and she couldn't hold back.  She came with a cry and a shudder as he fucked her hard and sucked on her earlobe and she felt every sensation from that ear down to her little toe.  Her orgasm set him off, and he came inside her and then collapsed on top.

"Oh my god, Robin."

"It's been a while, Regina."

"Yes. For me, too."

"That was..."

"Yes."  She flipped him around slightly so she could rest her head on his chest.  She was as happy and content as she had been...she thought back...for a very long time.  "Should I get that wine now?"

"No.  I just want to fall asleep like this."

And that was fine with her.  Tomorrow there would be scrambling around to leave and pick up his son and awkwardness, probably, but tonight was perfect, and that's how it ended.


	3. Chapter 3

**October**

Regina got to the race site along the Charles River about thirty minutes before starting time.  That was just early enough to pick up her packet, attach her number and chip, warm-up, and arrive at the starting line five minutes before the gun.  She hated waiting endlessly.  She ran a 10k three times a year: April, June and her favorite one in October.  She had turned 40 in August and was secretly thrilled because it put her squarely as the youngest in her age group.  After coming in second repeatedly to some perky 35 year old in the 35-39s, she was ready to take on the 40-45s.

Except the first person she saw was clearly in her early 40s and clearly there to win.  It was 36 degrees and the woman was in a bright pink sports bra and micro running shorts.  She had zero body fat and those spindly arms that just cried out _I'm a badass runner_. Well, fuck.  Regina's abs were perfectly fine, but she was advertising them anymore. She was wearing cotton/spandex running shorts that hit about three inches above her knees and a Northeast Eagles Cross Country t-shirt. Her hair was pulled into a tight ponytail with a black yoga band around her head. 

Regina loved her cross country team.  They were running in New Hampshire this morning, and she hated to miss it. Cross country was still very much a white, privileged sport in the area. She loved nothing more than the reaction her runners got when they raced past the sea of white faces.  More than once she had heard a muttered comment from bitter parents about these Northeast runners just trying to stay in shape for track.  Whatever.  Henry's high school had won the state championship the year before. Regina had hoped that Henry would go out for the team and offered to train with him during his eighth grade year so he would be ready.

"You've met me, right?" He snarked at Regina's suggestion.  "Do they have cross country for the Wii because _that_ sounds like fun."

So Regina poured her energy and emotion into the Northeast runners.  It hadn't been a popular sport at the school in the past, so she fought for funding and recruited shamelessly.  She hired a new algebra teacher who wasn't the most qualified of the applicants but had been All-American in cross country in college.  He worked the teams out like they were in basic training all summer long and in three years they were top ten in the state for boys and top seven for girls.  Mr. Humbert was also holding his own in the math classroom, which was an added bonus.  He was also beautiful, and Regina had imagined him ravishing her about a dozen different ways while calling her Ms. Mills the whole time.  It hadn't happened because she valued her career too much, but in her head they were fabulous together.

Regina tugged on her shirt and stared at Pinky next to her out of the corner of her eye.  The gun sounded, and Regina pounded her watch as they took off.  Pinky had a strong start, of course, and Regina decided to draft off of her as long as she could, preferably until the final twenty meters when she would make her move.  It was a slightly faster pace than she would have chosen, but it was cold, and Regina was feeling rather fearless.  Lately instead of imagining Graham Humbert watching her and admiring her strides, she had replaced him with Robin who was more real and much more satisfying. She pictured herself hopping up on the bar stool that night and plunking down her age group medal.  _Show me how proud you are_.   Finishing mile two, Regina felt as strong as she ever had in a race.

She had gone through a marathon stage, as all runners she knew had.  She had trained, ran some regional marathons, qualified for Boston, ran Boston, and then had lost interest in the game.  Somewhere around the ninetieth minute of running she would always get so bored.  She ran one more, won her age group and then retired. 10Ks were so much more fun.  She ran the occasional charity 5k and was chasing a sub-twenty PR, but her heart was in the 10K.

Most of her running friends had moved on to triathlons or just straight up cycling, but Regina craved that asphalt pounding.  It was punishing and cathartic like no other sport.  She had started running at age ten with her father.  He was slightly older than she was now, and spent years of twelve hour days at his law firm office sitting behind his desk pounding out contracts for corporate clients. He was slightly paunchy, Regina remembered, and must have gotten some dire warning at a checkup because all of a sudden he was running around their neighborhood in short shorts at the crack of dawn.  Regina loved him like no one else in her life and finally had a chance of spending time with him every day.  She pulled on her own shorts and running shoes and joined him.  In about a week, she could run twice as fast for twice as long, but she always enjoy that few blocks of warm-up that they would run together. She joined cross country in the seventh grade and always ran in the top ten.  He would take off work early for every meet.  Autumn was her favorite time of year.

He had died of a heart attack the summer before her freshman year of high school.  She kept running.  It was less joyful, but she ran with more of a psychological purpose.  She had lost the only person she felt had ever understood her.  She had no use for her mother, a social climber who spoke like a Brahmin in spite of being a mill foreman's daughter from Lowell.  Regina made most of her life choices for a time based on what would piss off her mother the most.  Running instead of equestrian sports? Check. State university on a cross country scholarship? Check. Not taking a dime from her, becoming an English teacher, and not marrying a boy from an approved list of families? Check, check and check.  She had cut off contact with her years ago. The newspaper had run a profile on Regina a few years back, and they had contacted her mother for an interview.  Cora went on and on about how proud she was and how much she had cherished her daughter.  It was the funniest thing Regina had read in years.

As they rounded the mile four marker, the course presented its biggest challenge:  a half mile hill.  Regina had run this race for the past few years and was ready for it, but it seemed to take Pinky by surprise.  She slowed slightly.  Regina felt it immediately and a wide smile took over her face. She ramped her pace back where it had been the whole race and passed the other runner, smile still bright on her face, but she cut her eyes directly as they passed as if to say _see ya_. It was her fatal mistake.  Pinky hadn't looked back the entire race and had apparently been unaware of Regina right there the whole time.  That look set her off.  Just at the crest of the hill, she accelerated right past Regina and flew down the hill.  Regina did everything she could to keep up, but she never got within ten meters of her the rest of the race.  Fuuuuuuck.  She was furious with herself.  Wouldn't winning have been enough? She had to see Pinky's face, or it just wouldn't feel as good.  And here she was, second again, like always. Fuck you, Regina. Why do you have to be such a moron?

There was a curve right before the closing stretch and she lost Pinky for about five seconds. She hoped against hope that she would round the curve and be able to make a sprint of it, but no, Pinky had extended the lead and was coolly finishing as it it were the end of a job. Regina was furious.  Just as she was turning her head to see the clock at a distance, something caught her eye. There was a little boy holding a sign that said _GO REGINA!!!_ He was waving it at everyone, apparently unaware that Regina had just come into view. All of this seemed to be going on in slow motion, but she looked up from the boy into the face of Robin, pointing at her and yelling, "Go, Regina! Look, Roland, there she is! There's Regina!"

She blasted through the finish line, just then seeing the clock. 46:05.  A PR by almost a minute.  That was some consolation, she had to admit.  It didn't stop her from displaying her middle finger ~~accidentally~~ at Pinky as she grabbed a cup of Gatorade from a tray while a woman knelt beneath her and cut off the chip.

Robin and Roland were waiting for her just outside the gate. She was surprised and thrilled they were there.  She hadn't yet met Roland.  Robin threw his arms around her.

"You are so fast!  I had no idea!"  He stepped back and removed his jacket placing it around her.  She was still hot from the race, but it was a sweet gesture. "Roland, this is Regina." She loved it that she wasn't my friend Regina.  Just Regina.

"Look at the sign," Roland said to her. "Dad and I made it.  That's a robot." There was indeed a robot on it, below her name.

"I love it, thank you, Roland."

"We're all about robots these days," Robin explained.

"Robots are great," Regina said to Roland, who was flipping the sign around in the wind.  "How did you...?"

"It's not like you haven't mentioned it...several times," Robin laughed.  "Of course, I thought you were just a casual runner.  This was before I had seen the queen in motion."

Regina smacked him in the arm but was thrilled to hear him describe her in those terms.

"Roland and I are driving out to the country to a pumpkin patch today, and we wanted to know if you would go with us?"

"I would love to go...but what about the pub?"

"I take off one Saturday a quarter.  I have been dying to tell you, but I wanted this to be a surprise.  That's why I asked you approximately fifty times this week if you were coming to the pub Saturday night."

Regina was flooded with happiness she wasn't even sure she was capable of, especially moments after she had lost a race.  She led them to the tent where she had stowed her bag this morning. "I jogged down here to warm up.  Let me run back and get a shower, and you can pick me up, or I could..."

"I'll drop you off at your place, haven't you done enough running?  Roland and I will go check out that music shop down your street while you get ready, and then we'll go."  He pulled her close and whispered in her ear "Although, I must say you look fabulous right now." He placed one hand on her ass and squeezed.  If Roland hadn't have been there, Regina would have dragged him back to her condo and taken him in the shower.  Her body heated immediately at the thought. She pressed her body against his, hoping it was okay with Roland gripping on to his hand.  The little boy's attention was blissfully elsewhere, though, and Robin kissed her briefly but using his tongue in quite a deliberate way.  She took his hand and he led them to his truck.  Roland's carseat was in the middle, and she threw her bag in the passenger's side while Robin buckled in his son.

"Okay, you guys, see you in a bit!" She waved at them as they started walking down her street and she headed in.  She had planned on working most of the day but abandoned those plans gleefully.  She stripped her damp clothes off on the way to the shower and started thinking about sexy but not too obvious fall outfits as she washed her hair.  She settled on black skinny jeans with her brown boots, chambray button-down and a grandpa burnt orange cardigan.  It wasn't her usual style, but she had been dressing slightly more casually since she had started seeing Robin.  She would never admit it to her assistant principal, but she had been emulating Swan, just a little, in style. She blew out her hair and put it in velcro rollers as she put on subtle make-up, which was also a bit of a change.

She was starving so she quickly made herself a bowl of oatmeal and chugged down a mug of tea.  She texted Robin to let him know she was ready and waited for them on the porch.  Soon she saw them: gingery dad in jeans and a button down and red Adidas Nottingham Forest football jacket, and beautiful brown-eyed boy in jeans and a red and blue striped sweater. She felt herself smile involuntarily.

They climbed back in the truck.  "I thought we'd get burgers after the pumpkin patch, but you just ran six miles.  Can you wait that long?" Robin asked her.

"I ate just now, so we're good." She hoped there would be snacks at the pumpkin patch.  She tended to eat a lot on race days.  On long run days.  On most days, she thought.  It was one of the things she loved most about running.  She ate a lot.  She got on her phone as Robin drove onto the highway and googled the results, not sure she really wanted to see, but there _was_ that PR.

"Sorry," she apologized for her phone rudeness.  "I'm just going to check the results and then I'll put it away." She scrolled down to her time.  There was the PR in black and white.  She scrolled up.  Pinky's name was Janice Taylor.  She was 46.  "Aaaahhhh!" cried Regina. "I won!"

"What?"

"My age group.  I won.  The woman ahead of me was 46.  That sounds terrible," Regina laughed.  "Yay, a 46 year old beat me!  But I thought she was in my group, so I thought I was second."

Robin laughed, "You're so competitive, Ms. Mills."

"I am."

"Yay!" Roland said, unsure of what he was cheering for. He was a great car rider, and they had a fantastic drive through the beautiful countryside.  The pumpkin patch was packed, of course, but the proprietors knew their business well and kept things moving.  There was a hay ride out to the pumpkins.  Regina realized the last time she had been on a hay ride was in college.  There was less alcohol and less making out at this one.  Roland took her hand as they were climbing out, which surprised and pleased her.  He let Robin take the lead in choosing the pumpkin, and then he insisted they find one for Regina.  Regina hadn't had a pumpkin at home since before her father died.  Leo had left her before Halloween.  She tended to work late on the actual night and avoid trick or treaters.  Still, she was perfectly happy for this little boy to help her find her very own pumpkin.  She picked a medium one that was perfectly round and appealed to her sense of symmetry. 

They loaded the pumpkins back on the flatbed filled with hay.  Roland kept running his hands over the pumpkins, thrilled with the imminent purchase.  An older couple with no children but several pumpkins were seated directly across from them. The woman was clearly charmed by Roland.

"You two have the most beautiful eyes," the woman said to Regina.  She realized the woman meant Roland...and her.  She had no idea what to say.  Roland did indeed have beautiful eyes, and if this woman thought they were from Regina...she felt herself flush, not knowing how to respond.

"They really do," Robin said affectionately.  "Would you take our picture?" He handed over his phone to the woman and scooted closer to Regina with Roland and the pumpkins between them.  She handed back the phone and Robin smiled at the picture and showed it to Regina.  She almost gasped.  They looked every inch a family.  She hoped Roland wouldn't call her _Regina_ and break the spell.

Robin paid for the pumpkins, and they headed back to the truck.  "I know a great burger place, but it's a bit of a drive, are you okay to wait?"

Regina hadn't even thought about food.  Good lord, what was this man doing to her?  They chatted about the pub and Roland's school friends.  He went to preschool at the church around the corner from the pub. He was very excited to be in the four year old room. Regina loved the happy family glow she felt still, an hour after the picture incident.  She allowed herself to be caught up in this fantasy.  What if she had met Robin seven years ago, before Leo? What if she had met him fifteen years ago before...she didn't even want to think of the name and be plunged again into sadness.  Seven years ago, then.  She met Robin.  They fell for each other immediately, just like... They got married.  She had her same career, but she helped him in the pub on weekends.  They got pregnant on accident, but not really.  They had Roland, and two years later a brown-eyed sister.  Annabel? Genevieve? Something like that. The fantasy swept her away until it hit her that she just wrote Henry out of her life.  Yikes.  Okay, she met him five years ago, not seven.  She chuckled under her breath.

"What are you smiling about?" Robin asked her with a smile of his own.

"This has been a great Saturday," she said.

"I agree."  They pulled into the divey restaurant.  They ordered cheeseburgers, fries and onion rings, and Regina enjoyed a month's worth of saturated fat calories.  It was delicious.  She wanted a malt, but she didn't want to seem too gluttonous.  Luckily, Roland wanted one.  It was great to have a kid around. Roland reminded her a lot of Henry.  Only children, they were both very comfortable around adults and were articulate beyond their years. Roland was neither obnoxious or shy and treated Regina as if she were an old friend.  

They all three got different shake flavors and taste-tested them all.  Roland passed out on the way back to town, and Robin turned the music down and reached around his sleeping son to rest his hand on Regina's knee.  Regina wished she could just pretend to be the mommy here.  To go back with them to their little apartment she hadn't yet visited and help Robin carry him in and tuck him in bed.  To follow Robin to his room and quietly make love the way one does when there is a sleeping four year old in the house.  There was nothing she would rather do, and she let herself think about it for miles.

Roland spent every Saturday night, except she guessed, this once a quarter pub-free Saturday, with his maternal grandparents.  Regina stayed at the pub until it closed, helping to clean and shut it down.  It was one of those things she never would have believed she would be doing months ago, and yet she loved every moment of it.  When Little John finally clocked out and they chased off a divinity student named Tucker who was always on a bar-stool at the pub, Robin would lock up, and they would head to Regina's, stopping to make out and grope each other liberally on the way.  Last Saturday, they hadn't even made it out of the pub. 

She had been whispering filthy things in his ear all night to tease him, and as soon as the door closed with Little John on the other side, he had grabbed her and swung her over on the counter, pressing his already hard cock against her through his jeans.  She was wearing a just above the knee skirt and boots and she wrapped her legs around his waist as he kissed her neck aggressively, practically fucking her through their clothes.  He ripped down her scanty underwear--she had chosen them especially for tonight and she had a half second of disappointment that they didn't get any attention before he thrust himself in her, rendering her incapable of caring about such trivialities. She sucked on his earlobe as he fucked her in earnest and continued the dirty talk in his ear.  He groaned and placed a hand between them, rubbing her over the edge.  She cried out as she came and clamped her legs around him as waves of ecstasy rolled through her.  She could tell he was right on the verge, so she pushed him away and hopped off the counter. She grabbed him around the hips as she sunk to her knees and took him in her mouth, teasing him at first, and then letting him fill her all the way to her throat.  He told her he was going to come in case she wanted to back away, but she held him tighter as he unloaded down her throat with a long moan.

He raised her up gently and kissed her deeply.  "Regina," he whispered, as if he had something profound to say.

"Yes?" She whispered.

"That was hot."

They laughed and then went back to her condo where they stayed up half the night, talking, laughing and eating before making love long and slow and finally falling asleep.  She had made him a big breakfast that morning before he left to pick up Roland.  Sunday was his day with his son.

And that was why Regina realized she couldn't go home with Robin.  It wasn't time yet.  She loved the fantasy, but she wasn't Roland's mother.  They weren't a family.  Maybe they would be.  Nothing sounded better to her at the moment, but it wasn't time.

"Come back with us?" Robin asked, and she loved that he did.

"I can't, Robin."

"Soon?"

"I hope so. I loved today."

"I loved it too, Regina.  I...I haven't ever introduced him to anyone.  You know?  I haven't been a monk, you know, since Marian left. But I haven't had anything serious.  You..."  She could tell he didn't know how to go on.

"Robin, he's a wonderful little boy.  You are a great dad.  Thank you for letting me be with you today." Robin squeezed her hand.  When they pulled up in front of Regina's condo, they got out quietly as to not disturb the sleeping boy.  Robin walked over to her side of the truck and pulled her into his arms. He kissed her longingly, and she kissed him back, pulling him as close to her as she could.

"Good night," she said.

"You're torturing me," he said with a quiet laugh.

"You'll be fine."

"Saturday?"

"I'll be there."  She waved and walked up to her front door with a huge grin. Six more days.

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**November**

It was the Wednesday before Thanksgiving, and Regina couldn't sleep.  Henry was in the rarely used guest room and would spend the whole day with her tomorrow.  Leo had only days left, and Mary Margaret and David wanted to spare Henry of a Thanksgiving spent that way.  So they had sent him on the train, and he and Regina were celebrating at the pub tomorrow--closed except for family and friends. She had picked up Henry at the station and they had gone for pizza at their favorite place and then to a movie.

"We're spending Thanksgiving in an English pub because, of course," Henry had teased her.

She had quizzed him extensively about school.  He loved his Latin teacher and thought his physical science teacher was a tool. They were Facebook friends, but Regina suspected he kept her on a limited view list.  A girl named Sofia had tagged him in a picture at a dance at the Catholic girls' high school, and Regina asked him about it, but all Henry would tell her was that the dance was "fun" and Sofia was a "friend."

She had made four apple pies that were sitting on the counter, ready to go.  Henry had brought two bottles of wine.  Regina tried not to laugh at bringing alcohol to a party at a bar, but in Mary Margaret's defense, Henry probably hadn't told her where they were spending the day.  Regina felt a little bit guilty as she realized Mary Margaret had made sure Henry wouldn't arrive empty handed in spite of being at her father's deathbed.

She couldn't remember the last time she'd had a real Thanksgiving.  Usually she went straight to the airport from school Wednesday afternoon, off to some remote tropical location with three bikinis, two dresses, running clothes and two pairs of sandals in her bag.  Three days of beach, running, reading and anonymous sex. Her goal was to say fewer than twenty-five words from the time she left school until she was back Monday morning.  Last year she had fucked a guy in her bathroom while his wife was getting a pedicure.  She hadn't even told him her name.  He was Brad, which had almost deterred her from continuing. She hardly remembered anything else about the incident.  She had confessed all of this to Robin when he asked her to spend the holiday with her. 

"Regina Mills!"

"I know."

He had laughed it off but had taken the next opportunity to seduce her in the shower.  He had taken her from behind and made her come twice.  He walked around the rest of the day like he had conquered France.

She couldn't believe how lucky she was.  Henry sleeping in the next room, and she was going to have a real holiday with him.  The school year had been relatively uneventful so far. She had an adorable boyfriend and regular, amazing sex.  Roland was an incredible little boy and had taken part of her heart already.  She was happy, she realized. Regina was happy.

She was running a 5K sponsored by the Boys and Girls Clubs of Boston in the morning, and she had to get some sleep.  It was an annual Thanksgiving themed race, and it got cancelled because of weather half the time, but it was supposed to be fine in the morning.  Freezing, but fine.  Her 10K PR had spurred her on to speed train for this thing, and she was going to give sub-twenty a go.  She willed herself to sleep, imagining striding during a long run from her marathon training days.  She would reenact all twenty miles if necessary.  The next thing she knew her phone was clanging, and it was six thirty.

She got up and pulled on her black running tights, a men's black hoodie that came almost to her knees, her running shoes and socks and a black elastic belt she had made with a big silver buckle.  She pulled her hair up and then put on a white wool beanie she had attached a handkerchief to so that it looked more square than round. She knocked on Henry's door.

"I'm not awake," he told her.

"You have time for a quick shower and there are at least five Starbucks between here and the starting line," she told him and made her way into the kitchen where she downed some water and ate a banana. She took one of the pies in her hands and brought it up to her nose.  She inhaled indulgently and let the sensation flood her body. Henry emerged about fifteen minutes later in skinny jeans and a flannel button down over an Arcade Fire t-shirt.  Regina smiled to think that he and Robin would probably be dressed identically.

"What are you wearing?" Henry asked her incredulously.

"I'm a pilgrim."

"Oh my god."

"An Indian princess would be cuter, but...cultural appropriation," she told him. He got his phone out to take her picture and she smiled and posed.

"Tag away!" She told him.  Her only Facebook friends were Henry, Robin, a few of the people from the pub, several friends from college and one or two folks from the Boston running community. Any work related friend requests were met with an eye-roll and an immediate decline.

She snagged him a latte on the way to the race.  He helped her with her number and then headed off to find the finish line.  She made her way to the front and staked out a spot next to a guy in a turkey hat. He looked like a college cross country runner in short-shorts and a Harvard t-shirt.  She jogged in place and jumped up and down to keep warm until the gun, and then pounded her watch and took off.  Turkey was keeping about an eighteen minute pace, which she couldn't sustain.  She had run mid-eighteens in college, but that was over twenty years ago. Still she kept as close as she could to Turkey and by mile two, she felt stronger than she had in a race in a long time.  Mile three was almost entirely downhill, bless the race designer's heart, and when she rounded the last corner she could barely see the clock at 250 yards from the finish.  She glanced at her watch. 19:02.  She sprinted in earnest and passed three people.  She wished she could scan the crowd for Henry, but she could see the clock now, and she wanted to beat 19:50.  She crossed at exactly 19:46 and collapsed at the waist while the volunteer cut off her chip.

Before she could stand up there was a cacophony of noise around her:  _Regina!  You were so fast! Way to go!_ from three different voices. 

"You did it!" That was Robin's voice.

"What are you doing here?" She asked him.  "It's too cold for Roland," she scolded.

"Nonsense!  We Locksley men are made of strong stock.  He knelt down by Roland's side and growled.  Roland growled in his little voice.  "Anyway, it's not every day you get to see the queen run a 5K in under twenty minutes." They got her in a four-way hug with Robin and Henry on each side and Roland holding her around her middle.  She was full of adrenaline from the race and she felt like her heart would burst from running and from happiness.  They let go, and she took off her hat and shook out her hair.  Robin pulled her into him and kissed her by her ear.  She looked up expecting Henry to be making a face at her, but he was engrossed in a robot conversation with Roland.

"I'm surprised you're not slaving over the turkey, or whatever you do with turkey," she told him.

"No, we're frying that bird.  Everything else is pretty much ready to go.  I thought we would go back to yours and watch the parade while you get ready.  Unless you want to wear that, which would be quiet festive, actually."

"No, let's go back," she punched him teasingly in the shoulder and they headed back to the cars.

At her condo, Robin made a pot of tea and Henry got out the leftover pizza for them to snack on.  Regina grabbed a huge water and a slice and headed back to shower.  She downed the pizza in about five bites and then stripped off her damp clothes and took the water in for a quick shower.  She had a new outfit to wear:  a grey wool sleeveless dress and then brown boots and jacket that made her eyes look almost amber.  She put on grey woolen tights and the dress and then dried and set her hair in hot rollers.  While she was doing her make-up, she could hear banter between the guys watching TV in her living room.  She cracked the bathroom door so she could hear what they were saying.

"Why aren't you out there marching with the band?"

"We're not that kind of band, and who wants to freeze their...rear end off at a parade on Thanksgiving?" Regina chuckled at Henry demurring his language for Roland's benefit.

"No, you just want to freeze your rear end off watching crazy people run 5Ks."

"Hey!" Regina shouted from the bathroom as she took her hair down from the rollers. Her dress was slightly low-cut and hit about an inch above her knees.

"Sorry!"  She heard Robin walking down the hall in his socks. He came into the bathroom and took her into his arms from behind, resting his head on her shoulder and looking at them in the mirror. She wrapped her arms around his and caressed the lion on his forearm. 

"I'm almost ready."

"No rush.  You look beautiful."

"Thank you." He left and she put in some tiny pearl earrings.  The neckline with the dress and jacket was enough that she didn't need a necklace. She pulled on the boots and jacket and went out to meet them.  They would take two cars so Regina could go straight from the pub that evening to drive Henry home. Regina grabbed her bag and Scrabble.  Robin graciously thanked Henry for the wine and loaded it and the pies into the truck, and they took off.

The Major Oak looked bright and appropriately festive for the day. Little John's wife Catherine was setting three long tables in the middle where the bar tables had been cleared away.  Roland ran to his grandparents, whom Regina hadn't met.  She was nervous, but Marian's dad came right over and introduced himself.

"You must be Regina.  Roland hasn't stopped talking about you.  And Robin...well, he's gone."

"Mike!" Marian's mother chided her husband.  "We are so happy that Robin has found someone who Roland is so taken with," she looked at Regina kindly and took her forearm in her hand affectionately. 

 _I love them both_ was the truth, but Regina couldn't say it.  Instead she leaned in for a minimal contact hug, which Marian's mother took over, thank goodness.  Regina had never been a hugger of people she didn't really know or love.  The couple explained that after dinner, they were taking Roland for Thanksgiving part two at Marian's brother's house. They had another grandson Roland's age there.  

Besides Marian's parents, Little John and Catherine and their son Declan, the rest of the pub crew was there with their significant others. Tucker was there because he had nowhere else to go. The beer was already flowing and American football was on all the TVs. Robin led the men to the alley to start the fire for the turkey.  Of course Henry and Roland wanted to go, too.

"Wouldn't it be more fun to stay in here and draw robots?" Regina asked Roland.

"I want to draw robots outside!" He answered. 

"Me, too," cried Declan.

"Promise me you won't blow anything up," she implored Robin.

"Of course not!" He answered with a twinkle in his eye.  Regina bundled Roland up in another layer and wrapped the Nottingham football scarf tightly around him.  She found one of the small bar tables and dragged it outside with three chairs and Roland's coloring box, setting them up a safe distance from the fire.  He had all sorts of things to keep him busy in the pub when he was here with his dad.  She sat with them but was delighted when Henry took her place, being a much better draw-er of robots.

She joined Robin by the fire.  He pulled her in close at his side.  The men were discussing oil temperature, and a lusty debate ensued.  Robin's side won, naturally.  The men went on to discuss the current NFL season.  Robin looked over at her and kissed her gently.  "I'm so glad you're here today," he said quietly.

"Me, too." 

"This whole holidays at the pub thing...I don't know," he said quietly. "I mean I love it, and I'm not thinking about selling. But it may be time to...start looking at good schools...and houses."

Regina had no idea what to say to that.  Robin had said nothing explicitly that she was included in any of these plans. But there was some subtext, she thought. She bravely squeezed him close in response.  He turned again and kissed her tenderly. She looked up to see if the others were laughing at them, but they were preoccupied.  Or maybe they were happy that their friend had found someone he liked. 

The little boys were ready to go in, so she dragged the table and their detritus back into the pub.  Catherine and Marian's mother Betty were scurrying around the kitchen, so Regina set the boys up with a train set on the dance floor and went in to help.  Word came in that the turkey was about to come out so they started carrying big, steaming bowls into the front of the pub to put on one of the long tables.  Robin arrived with his merry gang behind him carrying the turkey high on a platter.

"Make way for the limey to carve!" He set the platter down at the head of the table.

"Let it rest for a few minutes," Little John cried and held up his beer.  So they toasted.  They toasted the New England Patriots and the Nottingham Forrest.

"To real football!" Robin cried lustily.  They toasted Northeast Cross Country. 

"State bound!" Regina interjected.

They toasted friends and family. "And family not here," said Betty wistfully, and of course they all thought of Marian. Regina looked over at Henry, who looked sad about his own family, Regina presumed.

"And Robin! Turkey frier and carver!"

"To Robin! To The Mighty Oak!"

"To Robin!" 

Robin started carving.  The serving table was practically overflowing.  All of the Thanksgiving classics were there: two kinds of stuffing, cranberries, potatoes, bowls of steaming vegetables, including green bean casserole, macaroni and cheese--Betty had made it with Roland in mind, and Regina knew that Henry would be glad to see it, too--a massive fruit salad, homemade rolls and several kinds of pie.  Regina noted with glee that the apple pies were the prettiest.

Robin cried out that he had finished the carving, and everyone crowded him to smack him on the back in gratitude for this all.  Regina looked at him surrounded by all these people who clearly adored him.  She remembered her first impression that day in court:  aging hipster to be written off after one look.  And he had won her over, not because of his beautiful eyes or his sexy accent or his sense of humor, all of which she now loved.  She had fallen for him because he had made himself that girl's, the victim's champion.  He refused to let her be hurt without recourse.  It was who he fundamentally was.  Regina realized she had skipped a breath and steadied herself against a chair behind her.  The scene in front of her resumed.  Betty and Catherine had swooped in to make plates for the little boys.  Little John had an overflowing plate in one hand and a turkey leg in the other.  Robin was encouraging everyone, but paying special attention to Henry to get in line and fill plates. Regina breathed deeply and strode over to him taking him by the arm and speaking softly in his ear.

"Can I set aside some food to take to Mary Margaret and David?"

"Of course!" He led her into the kitchen to grab to-go containers.  As soon as they were in there, she took him in her arms and kissed him.

"What was that for?" His smile took over his face.

"I'm thankful for you," she said.

"Oh, Regina.  You have no idea," and her took her face in his hands and kissed her back.

They rejoined the group and made the Nolan's heaping dinners and then filled their own plates.  Regina realized as she sat that she was famished, and she enjoyed every bite.  She was too stuffed for dessert, but she looked with pleasure at how popular her pies were, especially after Robin brought out a tub of vanilla ice cream.  Mike, Betty, and Roland left for their next event, and the beer started flowing.  The TVs were turned up, and loud conversations and laughter rang out.  Regina cleaned everything with help from Catherine and then sat down with Henry and Scrabble.  They had ongoing, very serious games of _Words with Friends_ on their phones, but they loved to play the real thing.  A couple of the girlfriends wanted to play too, so Regina and Henry begrudgingly let them and tried not to roll their eyes too hard when triple word scores were wasted and easy turns were passed. After that game, Regina and Henry played for real, and it was extremely close the whole way.  Regina triumphed at the end when she added an _s_ to _squire_ and made _savvy_ on a triple letter. She tried not to gloat too much.  It was time to take Henry home.  He shook hands with the men and Robin helped them take the food to the car.  Regina had set aside a whole apple pie, and also got Catherine to donate half a pumpkin one given the circumstances.  Robin hugged Henry and waited until he was in the car to turn to Regina.

"Please come back to the pub," he implored, and Regina realized he was quite drunk. "Roland is spending the night with Mike and Betty; we can go back to my place," he said too loudly.  He grabbed her and kissed her, and she laughed.  "Please come back," he reiterated.

"I will.  Sober up."

"Okay."

Regina got in the car to Henry's laughter.

"He loooooooves you."

Regina didn't say anything.

"He really looooooooves you," Henry teased her again.

She smacked him lightly on the leg, and he laughed some more. They drove quietly for a while, listening to Henry's music, smooth jazz that Regina didn't really get.

After a while, Henry spoke up. "Did you love my grandpa like that?" Regina had known it was just a matter of time before she had to get into this with Henry.  She sighed.

"Yes." It wasn't the whole truth by a wide margin. She had met Leo at a party honoring donors at the university where she had just received her masters.  She was teaching high school English and had spent the last three years in grad school at night.  Leo was very good looking, and Regina admired everything about him...and his lifestyle.  She had been completely infatuated but not in love. Everyone was against the marriage, so of course she jumped in with both feet.  They were unhappy from day one.

"What happened between you two?"

"We met right after your grandma died.  We liked each other right off. But it was too soon; he was still grieving for your grandma.  We got married right away, and it just didn't work out."

"Aren't you worried that the same thing will happen with Robin? That Roland's mom will come back?"

"Yes," she answered honestly.  "I _am_ scared.  It's really hard to give your heart to someone.  But if I walked away in order to spare myself potential pain..."

"You might give up on something great," Henry said.

"Exactly."  Of course she didn't feel that glib about it, but they were pulling into the front drive of the Nolan's huge, beautiful house. They grabbed the food and Henry's bag and walked up to the door.  Mary Margaret and David were sitting at the kitchen table looking exhausted.

"How's Grandpa?" Henry asked.

"It won't be long now," his mother answered.

"Mary Margaret," Regina said in her kindest voice. She didn't know what else to say that wouldn't piss Mary Margaret off, so she left it at that.

"They're doing a good job of keeping him comfortable."

"We brought you food," Henry put the containers down and David started in on them immediately.

"This looks amazing," he told them, and he got up to get plates.

"Thank you so much, Regina, for having him and for bringing this back," Mary Margaret said wearily.

"Oh, of course." Regina hugged Henry and whispered, "Love you" in his ear.  He hugged her tightly in response.  She saw herself out.

The whole drive back, she thought about her conversation with Henry. She was so far gone.  If something happened, instead of just being humiliated like she had been with Leo, she would be crushed.  It was terrifying.  She had been through this before.  She tried not to think about Daniel because it was too painful, but these feelings for Robin kept dredging it up.  She let herself think about Daniel for a moment.  If you had known how it would end, she asked herself, would you have even started it?

Yes.  Yes.  She would a thousand times.  She wouldn't trade that time for anything, even avoiding tragic heartbreak.  And this time, there was Roland, too.  But her answer was the same.  She loved them. She had to risk it.

 She pulled back into the pub, and Robin came right out, waiting for her.  He locked the door and took her hand leading her in the direction of his apartment, two blocks away.  It was so cold, she huddled right next to him, and he dropped her hand, and put his arm around her. They talked animatedly about the day.

"Little John and that turkey leg!" Robin could hardly get the words out. "We took a picture of it to go right above the bar."

"That was the most fun Thanksgiving ever," she told him.

"More fun than bathroom adultery and mai tais?" He laughed.

"By quite a bit."

"Well, that's a relief." They laughed and walked.  The apartment was on the second floor of an old pharmacy.  They hurried up the narrow staircase, and he unlocked his door.  The apartment was old fashioned with high ceilings and beautiful wood work. It was tastefully decorated with period appropriate furnishings.  Besides a pair of small sneakers and a toy basket in the corner, one wouldn't guess that a four year old ran around here. Robin either had a fantastic cleaning person or was a meticulous house keeper.  Given the condition of the pub, she suspected the latter.  She took off her coat and hung it on a coat rack by the door next to his. 

"Do you want a drink?"

She looked at him and smiled.  "No." She took the brown jacket off slowly and hung it with her coat.  He took the hint, and came into her space, kissing her neck while unzipping down the back of her dress.  She let it fall to the floor and stepped out of it, placing it on the back of a chair.  She unzipped the boots and pulled them off.  She removed her tights to reveal a 40s inspired matching underwear set in cream and black lace.

He touched her shoulders gently taking her in from head to toe.  "Regina, you are gorgeous," he breathed.

She took his hand.

"Bedroom is that way?"

"Yes," he said softly and let her lead him.  They passed Roland's room with a twin bed and robot everything.  Robin's door was closed, and opening it revealed a made double bed, simple dresser and bookshelf.  Immaculate like the rest of the apartment.  She turned to him and took off his button-down, and then slid his t-shirt over his head.  He reached for his belt.

"No, let me," she said.  "You worked all day."

"You ran and then cleaned up the whole pub..." he started to say but she shushed him.

"Just let me do this."  He shut up and let her take down his jeans.  He kicked off his shoes and then removed his jeans and socks.  She pushed down his boxers slowly, pausing to run her hands along his strong thighs and calves.  Soccer players, she marveled. She led him to the bed and laid him down on his back.  She removed her panties a bit showily and tossed them aside. It was hard to see in the dark room, but he seemed to have an expression of amusement and awe. She left on the bra to give him something to look forward to. She climbed on the bed and opened the curtains behind it slightly, letting light from a streetlamp in. He was still on his back, cock standing at attention temptingly.  She straddled him and lowered herself down, impressively wet already.  She sat up straight and let his length fill her all the way.  She tightened herself around him, and he moaned deeply.

"I won't last long at this rate," he warned.

"Come when you want; this is all for you," she said breathily, playing it up to the hilt. She rose and fell slowly, throwing her head back and tossing her hair a bit.  He reached for her and brought her down so he could kiss her and run his hands all over the lacy bra.  He reached around and unclasped it, putting it aside and letting her breasts fall into his face.  He took one and then the other into his mouth while she rode him up and down, savoring every movement.  He reached a hand down between them, but she removed it, guessing correctly that he would enjoy watching her pleasure herself.  She sat up tall again, still moving up and down on him and rubbed herself as she fucked him.

He called out her name as he came inside her and she continued stroking herself to join him, letting out a loud groan as she did. He wrapped his arms around her and brought her to him, kissing her and moving to his side so he could hold her.

"Regina, do you know how hot you are?"

"I do, actually," she laughed.  "And right back attcha, Locksley."

"Thank you for everything, for today," he said.

"Thank _you_."

"Regina...I'm not good with words. I'm not good at expressing these things.  I'm so happy, though.  I want you to know that.  I'm so happy."

"Robin..."

"Yes,"

"You express yourself perfectly."

 


	5. Chapter 5

**December**

For the first time in her career as principal at Northeast, Regina was throwing a faculty Christmas party. In the past, she had spent the allocated party budget on Christmas bonuses that she suspected the faculty appreciated much more than some interminable dinner and white elephant exchange horror. No one had ever complained. But this year, Superintendent Gold was monitoring everything she did, and she was expected to throw a real party. She decided to make ten apple pies and have a fifteen minute get-together on the last day of school, where she would hand out the bonuses. She told Robin her plan in bed one Sunday morning.

“People love parties, though!” he had laughed.

“People love bonuses,” Regina retorted.

“I’m sure they do, but Christmas is the best time of year at the pub with people having their office parties, or coming in after. I think you may be applying your own feelings too stridently to your staff,” he suggested gently.

“I think there would be a riot if they didn’t get their checks,” Regina insisted.“I know they realize that others in the district don’t get them.”

“What if you had the party at the pub? I could donate the food, and at least part of the drinks, as long as they don’t go crazy. Are your staff big drinkers?”

Regina had no idea. She suspected they might be. “I’ll cover the alcohol. I have my Thanksgiving trip money,” she added. “I’ll make the pies. I have no idea if anyone will actually show up.”

“I think you’ll be surprised,” Robin laughed and grabbed her, pulling her on top of him.

“I have to get you breakfast before it’s time to pick up Roland,” Regina protested, but not very forcefully.

“Eh, breakfast,” he said, and that was the last either thought of it.

Regina proposed having the party at the pub but not using the budget item at her next meeting with Swan and senior staff that Monday.

“Regina! That’s a fantastic idea! Neal’s band can play!”

Regina was vaguely aware that Swan’s boyfriend taught calculus at another high school, but she had no idea about the band. “What kind of music do they play?” Regina asked with a dubious tone.

“Covers, mostly. Some mock thrash-metal.” Swan put her fingers in that rock and roll devil thing that Regina associated with the 80s. “Baelfire!” Swan said in a raspy shout. “That’s their name.”

“It’s fine with me if they’re willing to play for free,” Regina figured this would nip Baelfire! in the bud.

“Absolutely! They would love to have a gig. I’ll text him. This is going to be amazing!”

Everyone seemed surprisingly enthusiastic. They had the party on the last Friday night before vacation. Regina had stayed up late the night before baking pies and filling out Christmas cards with the bonus checks in them. She had ordered a new red dress, drawing the line at a Santa hat. Robin had picked up the pies that morning from her condo while she was at work so she could go straight to the pub. It seemed like everyone was coming and bringing a date. She changed into her dress and party heels in her office and then headed over to the party.

The Major Oak looked beautifully decked out with three tables of food including her gorgeously displayed pies. Regina silently thanked Catherine. The band was already there setting up, like the responsible math teachers they were. Swan pulled one of the guys over to Regina. He was effortlessly handsome in the same way Robin was, except with dark hair. He had a disarming half smile, and Regina liked him immediately.

“Regina! This is Neal Cassidy.”

“Regina Mills,” she shook his hand and mustered up some charm. “Thank you so much for playing. Tell the guys thanks,” she added looking over at the rest of the band.

“We are thrilled to get to do it,” he said sincerely. “Emma thinks you’re the most brilliant person ever, by the way,” Neal said with a twinkle in his eye. Emma smacked him in the arm.

“Well, right back at her. I couldn’t manage without her help,” Regina said honestly. She was very hard on Swan, she knew, but she had always been impressed with her intelligence and drive. She had often felt threatened by Swan’s youth and obvious ambition, but Emma had never been anything but loyal. Regina smiled as warmly as she could, and Emma responded by winking at her. Just then Robin appeared from the back looking…something. Regina couldn’t read it but was instantly on alert. Robin saw them and came right over; smiling graciously, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes. Regina’s whole body tensed.

“This is my boyfriend, Robin Locksley,” Regina introduced him, shocking herself with the label and blaming Robin instantly from throwing her off, but she glanced at him apprehensively, and his face lit up when he heard it. Relief. Robin put his arm around her and stroked her hip with his thumb.

“Robin, this is Assistant Principal Emma Swan and her boyfriend Neal Cassidy.”

“Yeah, I met them a few minutes ago,” Robin said. “I can’t wait to hear Baelfire!” He used that silly growly voice that Emma did. Was that the way you were supposed to say the name? The four made small talk, but Regina could tell something was up with Robin.

“I need to check on something in the kitchen,” she said to Robin, ever so subtly hoping to excuse them.

“Yeah, come on back,” Robin seemed relieved. The two of them walked through the swinging door to the kitchen. Robin pulled her close and kissed her. “You look gorgeous, Regina,” he said.

“Thank you,” she said with a concerned tone. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing! Nothing’s wrong,” he said way too quickly. “The party is going to be great. I scheduled a fleet of cabs to be waiting at 10:30, in case people have too much fun.”

“That’s a great idea, but something is stressing you. This all looks fantastic, by the way,” she hugged him close and she felt him sigh. “Tell me what’s going on,” she ordered him.

He looked at her for a moment. “It’s Marian.” Regina’s stomach dropped to her feet. “She showed up out of nowhere this afternoon. She’s over at her parents’ house.”

Regina’s mouth was agape, she realized. She closed it pointedly and just looked at him.

“It shouldn’t affect tonight at all. Betty is going to pick Roland up from preschool and bring him to their house to stay. I’ll go over after the party and really find out what’s going on. For what it’s worth, she looks healthier than the last time I saw her. I have no idea…”

Regina took a full breath in. “It’s okay,” she reassured him. “Actually, it’s great for Roland if she’s back and healthy,” Regina said with as much conviction as she could summon. She despised the woman more than she ever had, but she wasn’t going to let it show.

“I’m sorry, Regina. What awful timing.”

“Robin, seriously, it’s not your fault,” Regina was ever so slightly annoyed that he even apologized to her. This should be nothing. It won’t be, though, her ever pessimistic nature was screaming inside of her. She choked back tears of rage and did everything she could to betray nothing on her face.

“Thank you so much for helping me with this party, for doing all of this,” she told him and hugged him again, feeling him against her and taking a physical picture to save, just in case.

“Oh, of course, Love.” Love, he called her in tender moments. He had never actually said he loved her. This seemed very important at that moment.

“Okay, well, people will be arriving soon, so I’m going to go back out with Emma.”

“I’ll be out in a minute.”

“Great!” Regina said with feigned cheeriness. She plastered a smile on and went to the front. Emma was bantering with Little John, and Baelfire! was doing a sound check. She sat down next to Emma.

“Beer? Gin and tonic? Red wine? Tequila shot?” Little John asked her.

“Better not.”

“Water with lime coming up,” he said as he poured her a drink. She noticed that Emma was also abstaining. Regina sipped her water and tried not to focus on the Marian news. Maybe everything would be fine. Maybe she would leave again next week. Maybe they would get remarried. Enough, she told herself.

Faculty members and their guests started trickling in. She greeted each one and tried to remember the names of the spouses and long-term significant others. She guessed her staff didn’t have warm, fuzzy feelings towards her, but she hoped she had earned their respect. No one seemed too intimidated by her, at least tonight.

Baelfire! played a set and there was some dancing, and a lot of eating and drinking. Catherine had put up some mistletoe that was seeing some action. Regina was standing with Emma Swan by the door when Superintendent Gold made his surprise appearance.

“Looks like a party,” he told the women dryly. “I guess your grandchildren aren’t here?” He looked at Regina.

“Not at a bar, no,” Regina answered him.

“Mine are all under six, so you know,” Emma quipped right along.

“By all means help yourself to food. There is anything you would like to drink,” Regina motioned to the bar, and her boss ambled over.

“Grandchildren?” Emma asked her with laughter, and Regina told her about Henry at the football game. “Regina, I had no idea, that’s great! And I would have loved to have seen his face, the old bat.” Emma said and linked her arm through Regina’s.

It’s not that Regina had no friends. She’d had lots of friends in college and some work colleagues she’d been close to over the years. But since her promotion, she had been wary of becoming too friendly with the people who worked under her. But she realized she might have to reevaluate the Emma situation. She liked this woman.

Gold left after about twenty minutes, but the rest partied on until after ten. She handed them their cards as the guests left, and some of them gave her a side hug, which was shocking but not unpleasant. The cross country coach Mr. Humbert even waggled his eyebrows at her and looked at the mistletoe, which made her blush through the stern look she threw him.

Throughout the evening Robin ran back and forth from the kitchen and was the perfect host. By the end, she could hardly feel apprehensive. All but a few stragglers had left and the band was packing up when the front door flew open and Marian strode in looking enraged. Regina recognized her immediately. Roland had a framed picture of her in his room, and there were a few old pictures on Robin’s Facebook. She looked as hipstery as ever, dressed like a college student with a braid on either side of her head. They two women met each other’s eyes. Marian strode past her towards the kitchen just as Robin was coming out.

“Do you know who she is?” Marian shouted at him. The room froze. The stragglers stared. Baelfire! looked up from their instruments.

“Okay, folks, time to go!” Emma called out as Robin hustled Marian into the back and Regina followed. She shot a look of intense gratitude at Emma before she walked through the door.

“What? What are you talking about?” Robin said gently. Handling her, Regina realized. Robin was showing great tenderness, and Regina had no idea if it was because Marian was fragile, or if he was still in love with her.

“It’s her!” Marian raged. “It’s Regina Mills!” She turned to Regina. "I saw a picture of you with Robin and Roland,” and she said Roland’s name with horrified offense, like she was appalled that Regina had been near her son, “at my _parents_ ’ house,” like that was the most revolting thing of all.

Regina had no idea why she was enraged about Regina’s existence beyond…jealousy? But that didn’t make sense with the level of fury coming from the other woman. Marian had left after all.

“Yes, it’s Regina,” Robin sounded very confused.

“Regina Mills. Principal of 5th Street Middle,” Marian spoke slowly and distinctly, as if it would all make sense.

“Oh my god,” Robin said.

In a flash, Regina realized who she was. It had happened at Regina’s last year at the middle school before she got her promotion to Northeast. Marian…it wasn’t Locksley, it was Johnson, just like her parents. Marian Johnson had been a music student teacher. Regina remembered her earnestly playing her banjo for the students and trying to get them to sing “This Land is Your Land” or some other folk song and being laughed out of the music room before the supervising teacher could stop it. Marian had wept in Regina’s office, and Regina had told her to buck up or to away, probably in close to those words. Regina had given that speech many times before. The student teachers who were cut out for the profession grew a backbone and figured out how to manage, and the weak ones quit. Marian had never come back.

“She told me I would never be a teacher,” Marian said in a loud, pained voice.

Regina doubted she had said just that. She had probably said if you don’t toughen up, you won’t make it.

“She was gleeful that I was having a hard time,” and that was a step too far.

“Now…” Regina started to say, but Marian cut her off.

“No! You ruined my life. You ruined my family.”

“Marian, stop!” Robin said calmly.

Regina wanted him to ride in and defend her, but of course he was in an impossible situation.

“Let Regina speak.”

“I was not happy about the situation. I was hoping you would be able to manage, that it would work out…”

“You didn’t help me. You sent me out the door.”

“I’m sorry. I can be abrupt sometimes,” Regina knew it was an understatement.

“Roland and I care very much for Regina, Marian,” Robin said firmly. “She is a wonderful person.”

“She caused all of this, Robin.”

“That’s not fair, Marian.”

“Oh, that’s perfect. You side with her, with this awful woman. What happened to you?”

“My wife disappeared,” he said with his usual kindness. “And you will not say that about Regina,” he said firmly.

Regina willed the tears behind her eyes to stay in place. They must.

“I left because of her! You know that!”

“No, Marian, I don’t know that. Blaming what happened on Regina…”

“Fine, Robin, I’ll see you at home. I don’t want her near my son,” she spit out as she left. Regina thought just then that if Marian had shown this kind of confidence in the classroom, none of this would have happened.

“Robin…”

“It’s okay, Regina, it’s all a big shock.”

“I had no idea…” And the tears come.

“Come here, Love,” he said and pulled her close. “It’s not your fault; you were just doing your job. Marian is justifying her behavior.” Robin gave a weary sigh. “I wish we could just go back to the apartment and forget this ever happened.”

“But we can’t.”

“No,” he rubbed his forehead with one hand, “No, I have to go over there and try to calm the situation down. Mike and Betty…”

Regina felt genuinely terrible that Roland’s grandparents, whom she had liked so much, now probably hated her. “Listen,” she looked right at Robin. It’s okay; it’s going to be okay,” she said with as much conviction as she could manage. “Sort it out. Call me later.”

“Okay, Regina, thank you.” He took her back in his arms.

“No, thank you, Robin, for all of this. Let’s get it cleaned quickly, and then you can go to her.”

“Oh, Regina,” Robin said with sadness that made the lump in her throat increase.

They quickly put the pub in order—Regina realized that Emma, the stragglers and the band, she supposed, had done a whole lot before they left.

Robin walked her to her car and kissed her. “Promise me you’ll be here tomorrow like normal,” he implored.

“Oh, of course,” Regina assured him, but she had an ominous feeling as she drove off. She had a fitful night of sleep and got to the gym early Saturday morning, first day of Christmas vacation. It was too cold to run outside. Regina hated winter for this reason. The stupid indoor track at the gym was tedious, and the treadmill was awful. She split her ten miles between each, not having fun for a second.

She and Robin had planned a dream Christmas. They had already gone with Roland to pick out a tree for the pub, but they were waiting until closer to Christmas to get one for the apartment. Robin had asked her if she wanted one for her condo, but then had told her she would be over at his apartment most of the time anyway, with a big grin. They had even started looking at houses, not explicitly for the three of them, but it was certainly implied.

She and Henry had built a real robot for Roland using Henry’s skill from Odyssey of the Mind, which he had participated in for years. . Henry and his family were going to Hawaii for the holiday because being at home would be too sad after Leo’s death in early December, but Henry was spending the whole weekend before with her. With Mary Margaret and David’s permission, she had bought him a new, very nice trumpet to replace the beater one he had played in middle school when he was learning. She had already wrapped it and was planning on having Robin and Roland over for dinner for Henry Christmas. She had picked out a gift for Henry to give to Roland; she was going to give him the robot on Christmas morning. Robin had asked her to stay over on Christmas Eve.

Her heart sank as she finished the run on the treadmill and pounded her watch. She should have been starving as the last time she had really eaten was lunch the day before, but she had a knot in her stomach, and nothing sounded good. She went to her office to work on a grant proposal and organization for the second semester. At four o’clock, she still hadn’t heard from Robin. She texted him.

 **Regina** : I probably shouldn’t come tonight. You need time to work this out.

She waited for five minutes and then tried to get back to work. A few minutes later, her phone finally dinged.

 **Robin** : That’s probably best. I’m sorry, Regina. I will come see you tomorrow.

With a heavy heart, Regina packed up her stuff and headed back to the condo. She stopped off for takeout Thai to choke down with a bottle of wine. She fell asleep around nine and woke up at four in the morning. Back to the gym for another punishing run.

He came over around two. As soon as he got out of the truck Regina knew. His head was practically hanging in his chest. She met him at the door, and he didn’t touch her as he came in. She walked over to her living room sofa and he followed. He looked devastated.

“There’s no easy way…” He started. Regina felt the tears immediately. She grabbed a tissue. “Regina,” he looked pained. “Regina,” he started again, “I want to do the right thing. I always try to do the right thing…but there’s no right thing here.”

Regina silently strongly disagreed.

“She…she wants to get back together. And I’m not ready for that. I told her that. But…”

“She’s Roland’s mom,” Regina helped him.

“Yes.” He looked at her with sadness…and love, Regina thought.

“And the situation between Marian and me…” Regina started.

“No! That has nothing to do with it! That’s not why I have to do this, Regina.”

She smiled sadly. He took one hand and placed it against her cheek. “I’m so sorry, Regina.”

Then don’t do it. “It’s okay,” she said quietly and turned away from his hand.

“It’s not,” he said forcefully.

Then fight! She thought.

“I feel like I have to at least try,” he said.

“I understand.” He took her hand in his then, and tried to say something.

“What?” She said quietly.

“Regina,” he said.

“Please just go,” she choked back a sob. He let go of her hand and walked to the door. She followed him, and closed it behind him, sinking to the ground on her side, sliding down the door. She put her head in her hands and wept.


	6. Chapter 6

**January**

 

The phone woke Regina at 1:45.  Robin.  She blinked and focused on the screen.  Nope, not a mistake. It was the first contact with him since that Sunday a month a ago.  In the time she was deciding what to do, it went to voice-mail.  She took it as a sign.

She had fallen into bed a few hours before after spending most of the day at a basketball tournament. Northeast had made the finals and won.  She had been called over by the band director to ceremoniously lead the student body in singing along to "Shout!", the school's victory song.  The team had come up behind her and enveloped her in a group hug.  It had been a rather glorious day in which she had hardly thought of Robin.  Okay, not exactly true.  The band of course reminded her of Henry, who reminded her of family, which reminded her that her dreams had been crushed.  But otherwise, maybe she was coming out of the fog.  And now...

She didn't think she could get back to sleep.  She had joined a second gym for these situations.  Her tony downtown gym closed at nine on the weekends.  She found one on the interstate that was open seven days a week twenty-four hours a day.  It was almost always deserted, aside from a security guard and receptionist, who was usually asleep the whole time Regina ran.  

Regina pulled on some running clothes and sweats, her heavy parka and running shoes and headed to the car.  She would probably do her planned long run at the regular gym tomorrow; this was just a supplement. 

She thought for a fleeting moment about calling him back.  Perhaps there was something wrong with Roland.  But no, it was Robin's pub night.  He was probably drunk and perhaps horny.  She wondered if he was fully back with Marian.  She wondered for the millionth time what sex was like between them.  Robin was too much of a gentleman to get into specifics with Regina, but he had told her outright that the sex between them--between Robin and Regina--had been the best of his life.  It was probably a line.  It _had_ been her best sex by quite a margin.  Daniel and Regina had been wonderful together, but they were young and much less experienced. 

Her mind went involuntarily to the last time she and Robin had fucked.  (She tried to recall it with as little sentiment as possible.) He had flipped her over on her back and made her come twice with his tongue before she tackled him, pinned him on _his_ back and fucked him proper. It was on a weeknight, and she had clamped a hand over her mouth and then his to prevent calling out and waking Roland. After his orgasm, Robin had pulled her close and flipped them on their sides and caressed her hair until she had fallen asleep.  Ugh, sentiment. In the morning, the three of them had eaten breakfast together before leaving for work and preschool. Just STOP.

She pulled into the deserted parking lot and jogged to the door, trying not to freeze her ass off on the way.  She swiped her card at the door and it clicked open. 

"There ya are," the security guard said.

"Yep."

She threw her bag and sweats into her locker and headed to the track.  She wondered if Robin would call back.  Didn't matter; she wouldn't answer.  She wasn't answering.  Maybe, though... What if she achieved her goal of a sub six minute mile? If she could run it in under six minutes, she could call him back.  Or answer when he called.  Welcome to crazy rationalization town, Regina. She did an easy paced warm-up and then got to work, recording her times on her watch.  She ran two mid-sixes and then pushed herself.  6:02.  Well, so much for that.  She ran a couple more miles and then headed for a treadmill and incline work.  She did a hilly four and then jogged back to the track for a two mile cool down.  She felt like she was exhausted enough to sleep until mid-morning.  She put her sweats back on and headed home and was asleep by four thirty.

She woke up empty.  She supposed she was hungry, but food was still mostly unpalatable.  She had been choking down enough to survive.  Her clothes were beginning to fall off of her.  She hadn't gotten out of bed much over Christmas break, except to run.  With the approval of Mary Margaret and David, Henry had invited her to go to Hawaii with them.  She had been touched but declined.  Catherine had called her to express support and sadness over the situation, but Regina had gotten off the phone as quickly as possible.  She had hidden them all on Facebook to protect her from seeing any happy Christmas scenes at the pub. She couldn't bring herself to unfriend them.

She had started back to school happy for the diversion and determined to channel her grief into hard work.  Emma had been very nice about the whole thing, asking no questions and treating her no differently.  She had even invited Regina to come hang out with her and Neal and their friends, which Regina thought she might do in a month or so.  Now she attended every school activity and threw herself into that Northeast world.  In particular, it was her goal that every student teacher assigned to the school that semester would be clamoring to work for her.  She had no desire to analyze that last thing closely at all. She knew that Robin had made her happier in all aspects of her life--even these things he really had nothing to do with, so even if it was just to spite him and the whole experience, she refused to go back and be miserable.  Well, except in those moment she couldn't push him from her thoughts. The English teacher in her enjoyed the irony.

She took it easier in the gym that afternoon, still feeling accomplished for her middle of the night jaunt and decided to do intensive speed work for the rest of the week.  Thursday afternoon, after watching the Northeast mock trial team come up just short against some fancy private school snots, she ran a triumphant mile on the track in 5:56.  Some asshole in his early thirties tried to hit on her.  She gave him a classic Regina sneer and left to shower at home.

It was Henry weekend, so she slept as well as she could Friday night.  She didn't want to fall asleep at the movies.  She and Henry tried a new Indian place, declared it a keeper and then saw a really cringe-worthy comedy they both hated.

On the drive home, Henry broached the subject they had been avoiding.

"You seem to be doing better."

"I hope so."

"It really sucks, Regina.  It pisses me off."

"Thanks, Henry.  It's okay. Actually predictable, really."

"My history teacher is so cool..."

"Yeah?"

"He's smart and hilarious. I think he plays in a band.  I tried to figure out if he was married.  Mom told me to look for a ring...:

"Henry!  You don't have to fix me up with your teacher."

"Well, there isn't a ring."

"I love you," she sighed the words.

"I love you, too, Regina."  They pulled into the Nolan's driveway, and he awkwardly side-hugged her.  "Let me know about Mr. Grant, okay?"

"Yeah, Henry, okay," she laughed.

She headed back to the city.  Having achieved her speed goal, she was tempted to head to the pub and just walk in casually.  She would love to see his face.  She would love to pretend it hadn't happened just for a few seconds, and see his expression.  But she had too much pride.  She went back to the condo and got ready for bed.  She fell asleep reading her running blogs.

She was jolted awake again by the ringing phone. Before she could rationalize herself away from it, she clicked it open.

"Stop calling me," she said flatly.

"Regina," his voice sent a wave of agonizing pleasure and sadness over her.

"Robin, what are you doing?"

"I just wanted to hear you."

"You are drunk."

"Yes."

"I'm not here to comfort you, Robin."

"Regina, just talk to me."

"You're shivering.  Where are you?"

"On my stoop."

"Go get in bed with your wife and leave me alone."

"I'm not in bed with her.  I'm not sleeping with her.  We're not..."

"Listen, Robin..."

"Can I come over?"

"NO!"

"I just want to talk."

"I'll talk to you on the phone," she could hear her tone soften.  "Go back to the pub, okay? You're going to freeze to death." She could hear him start to shuffle down he street.

"How are you, Regina?"

"I've been better, Robin."

"I'm sorry."

"That's nice."

"I don't know what to do.  I can't be with her. Whatever we had...it's not there now. It's gone. I...," he sounded anguished. Regina heard him turn the lock at The Mighty Oak and swing open the door.

"I don't know what you want me to say," she told him, but not unkindly.

"Say you want me to leave her."

"No, Robin."

"But _do_ you want me to?"

She wasn't sure how rational he was being or if he would even remember any of this.

"I want...I want a world where we're together. I wanted to be a family, Robin.  That's what I wanted." She heard a muffled noise on his end.

"Regina," he said her name quietly and she remained silent.  "I had to try for Roland.  My parents couldn't give us much, but they loved us and they stayed together.  It's what I wanted for Roland.  I have to try."

"Then there's your answer, Robin." Regina felt new hot, angry tears forming behind her eyes.  How dare he stir this all up again?

"But..." he cried out.

"NO.  Don't call me again.  Go back home.  Put your marriage back together.  Love your son.  Leave me alone." She clicked off the phone and threw it across the room.  She put on her running gear and headed out the door.

 


	7. Chapter 7

**February  
**

 

Regina pinned a large plume to the back of her up-do and smirked at herself in the mirror of her office bathroom.  Putting her hair away from her face highlighted how visible her cheekbones were--a benefit of the heartbreak diet.  The last time she had weighed as little as she currently did...she had to ponder.  Not after the divorce; that had been more anger then despair.  Her appetite hadn't suffered.  No, it had been after Daniel, of course. 

She buckled up her character shoes and left the office for the theater.  Her cameo was in the last part of the first act, but she wanted to be there for the cast non-sectarian good wishes, not really a prayer circle.  She had made this big, musical extravaganza a goal last year and was thrilled it was working out.  Of course she had no intention of actually being in the show, but when the drama teacher/production director approached her about it in January, Regina had agreed.  The students and audience seemed to get a kick out of it.  After last night's performance, she had thrown an appreciation cocktail party for all of the corporate donors she had recruited, and they had nothing but great things to say about the show, and about Northeast's turn-around, and, frankly, about Regina herself.

They were doing _My Fair Lady_.  The casting had been simple:  the kid who could act but not sing was Higgins, the kid who could sing but not act was Freddie, and there was one girl capable of pulling off Eliza.  She wasn't bound for Broadway, but she was fine.  The one revelation had been the kid cast as Eliza's father, who had stolen the show.  He was a frequent flier in Regina's office as a not terribly serious but still annoying class disruptor.  She had encouraged him to audition and was patting herself on the back at this triumph.  Now if she could just get him to graduate and send him off on the theater scholarship, it would be the perfect ending. 

Regina was playing a fancy woman at the ball who danced with the ruder-pest from Budapest and then passed on the gossip that Eliza was a princess.  Her one line was, "Royalty!  She must be!" and she got to dance with two other students in the group number.  It was the most fun she'd had in a while, and made her thoroughly forget her misery for a few minutes at each rehearsal and performance.

Of course, then it would all come back.  Lately, though, she had been transferring her grief into the Daniel box, neglected and gathering cobwebs for years in her psyche, finally brought down and examined.  She imagined that during her next heartbreak, she could tackle the Leo box, and then maybe some day the Robin one would be brought down.  That was if she ever allowed herself to lose focus enough to be in a position to have her heart broken--which she doubted. 

After the non-prayer circle, she settled into a comfy seat backstage where she could hear what was going on quite out of the way, and think about Daniel until it was time for her to enter the party scene with the crowd.

Daniel would be forty-three if he were alive.  Would he still be wiry, or would he have settled into middle age with a paunch? If he were the marine biologist he'd hoped to be, perhaps dives and that lifestyle would have kept his youthful body in tact.  She remembered the last time she had seen him, at the airport, wrapping herself around him and feeling his bones through his t-shirt, feeling sorrowful that she wasn't going with him, and of course having no idea what real sorrow she would be facing soon.

He was headed to Guam for the summer to study the reefs as a part of his graduate program.  They had met a little over a year before when he was finishing his first year of grad school and she was a senior in college.  They had fallen for each other quickly and had moved in together before she started her year of teacher prep.  She had applied for teaching jobs in Amherst with no luck, so she had applied to grad school, been accepted into the English program, and planned to go off with her boyfriend for a blissful Guam summer before she started in the fall.

She was still speaking occasionally to her mother at the time, and Cora had been horrified at the plans.  It was bad enough that Regina planned to be a high school teacher, but to be traipsing around the world with a completely unacceptable man was deemed too much.  Cora got to work on her Boston contacts, and almost immediately, Regina had an offer to teach English at one of the best public schools in Boston.  It was her dream job.  It was not something she could turn down.  So she shed a tear at the airport, wrapped her arms around Daniel and said goodbye. 

She had already moved into a smart downtown loft when she got a call from Guam in the middle of the night. Daniel had drowned in a diving accident. She had been his emergency contact. They were trying to reach his parents.  Regina had met them only once and had to call information for their phone number, which she passed on to the university officials in Guam, unable to make the call herself.  She met the body at the airport, but his parents took charge of the arrangements, and she was relegated the role of "Daniel's friend." Even their university friends had figured they were de-facto separated because of her move.  Regina grieved alone, hated her job teaching entitled twits, resented her mother to the point of cutting off contact, and threw herself into finding job at a different school going to grad school at night in administration.  The Daniel box had been put away, to bring her twinges of misery over the years and once again to be shoved back.

Now she reveled in the feelings and memories.  If she had gone with him, could she have saved him?  Maybe.  He had taken that last dive in questionable weather against the advice of his colleagues.  He wrote her two or three times a week that summer about how beautiful it was, and how much he wished she were there.  He was focused on getting the job done and then coming home.  They talked about spending romantic weekends in Boston and then moving wherever he got into a doctoral program, tony Boston school and her mother be blanked.  If she were there in Guam, perhaps he wouldn't have taken the chance, wouldn't have been fool-hardy.  

She imagined their life at some university in some coastal town. She was the principal of the high school, and he was a professor, focused mostly on research, which had been his passion.  They had a son who was remarkably like Henry, and a sweet, dark-eyed daughter as well.  The fantasy took her all the way to her five-minute call, when she made her way to her spot and got ready to take the stage.

It went as well as it had the night before, and her line got a big laugh in appreciation of her presence.  She exited the stage to wait for the curtain call, and picked up the fantasy where she left off.  She and Daniel were hosting a barbeque for their neighbors when it was time for her to bow. 

After the show, the curtain was raised so the parents could take pictures of their kids in costume.  She posed for several selfies with the kids and shook hands until the crowd was thinning out.  And then she saw him, standing in the back of the theater, watching her.  Their eyes met, and Robin started walking her way.  She froze.

"What are you doing here?" she asked in blunt tone.  She did not have the energy for this bullshit.

"I wanted to talk to you.  A kid came by the pub and asked if I would put up a poster for the show, and of course I did.  I thought sure you would be here; I did not expect you were actually in it," he laughed, and it melted her a little for a moment.  "You look..."

She instinctively stood back with her arms out so he could admire the long dress that cinched in her waist dramatically  and gave her rather more cleavage than she had normally.  He reached out and put a hand on the back of her waist, drawing her in, and she let him for half a second before she gathered her wits and pulled away.

"What can I do for you?" She returned to that tone.

"Regina," his voice was soft and a bit pleading. "I just want to talk.  Can we go for a drink?"

"Absolutely not."

"Please, Regina. Just give me ten minutes," he implored her with his eyes.

"Has anything changed since the last time we talked?" She asked him tartly.

"Yes," he said emphatically.  "I'd rather not get into it here," they looked around at the almost empty auditorium.  The head custodian looked exhausted and ready to go home.

"Fine.  Let me change in my office, and I'll give you ten minutes.  There's a dive down the street.  I don't want to go to the pub."

"No, that's fine."

"Thank you, Fred, have a good night, see you tomorrow," she called to the custodian as she led Robin through the big doors and down the hall to her office.

"The school looks great," Robin commented. 

Oh just stop being ingratiating, she thought.  But it was a good strategy on his part.  The school did look great.  She encouraged the teachers to show off student work and progress in all the public spaces, so in every corner there was student art, or a collage celebrating Model UN or a math club district trophy.  But she crossed her arms and gave him the side-eye.  She was not relenting.

She closed her office door behind her and managed to unzip her costume without assistance. She hung it up on the hook on the door, unbuckled her shoes and removed the stockings, placing them on the shelf.  She unpinned the feather on the back of her head and shook out her hair.  It was then she remembered the outfit she had worn in that evening.  She put on the jeans and sneakers and thought frantically about any stray Northeast t-shirts she might have in the office.  Why hadn't she just worn her work suit? But she had rushed home that afternoon to rest before the show and had of course changed clothes.  Having no other options, she pulled on Robin's enormous Boston College hoodie that had been something of a security blanket for her in the last two months. It had been washed enough that it couldn't still smell like him, but somehow it did. Sigh. She felt like she was ceding the high ground by just walking out of her office in it. She rolled her eyes and opened the door.  He smiled broadly when he saw her.  Brilliant.

"Regina," he said, and he walked carefully over and put his arms around her.  She wanted to walk away again, but she _so_ didn't want that.  "Regina, what has happened to you?" he pulled back, holding on to one of her arms.  "You're..."  He struggled for the words, realizing he was stepping in a mine field.

"I've lost weight," she said flatly.

"You didn't have weight to lose," he said with guilty tone.  There was that.

"I'm fine."

"Can you run with...?"

"Oh, it hasn't hurt my running."  Buddy, you have no idea.

"I'm sorry--is this because...?"

She wasn't going to give anything else away until she heard what he had to say.  "I'm ready.  I'll loop into the auditorium parking lot and you can follow me," She grabbed her bag and headed out the door, checking the automatic lock.  She saw Fred's truck, so she didn't set the alarm.  She strode out to the Accord, not looking back at Robin, trying to maintain her composure, and willing herself not to get her hopes up.  Did she even want to go back to that place and risk getting her heart trampled again?  Yep.  Sadly, yes.  Joyfully, yes.  She would go back in an instant.  Henry was coming in tomorrow to see the last performance.  She had a glimmer of hope that she would have good news for him.  She felt tears forming, once again.  Regina!  Don't lose yourself in hope.  It was the most crushing thing she knew.

She turned the key and pulled out of the lot, seeing that familiar truck waiting for her.  It was Friday night.  She wondered where Roland was.  Where Marian was.  She drove to the bar, checking constantly in the mirror for him.  She pulled in, and waited for him to get out of the truck.  She joined him and they walked in, finding a booth in the corner. 

"Beer?  Wine?  G and T?"

She was dubious of the wine selection here.  "Beer.  You choose."

She settled in.  Cat Stevens's _Wild World_ was playing loudly from the jukebox.  Robin returned with two beers and sat across from her.

"So, how've you been?" She asked him with a sly look.

"Listen, Regina.  I fucked the whole thing up, I know.  In my head, I had this ideal, and I felt like a shitty father if I didn't try to put it all back together.  But it wouldn't work.  It couldn't.  I don't love her."

It was the first time Regina had heard him use the word _love_ applied to any woman. She drew in a breath and said nothing.

"I...love you, Regina.  I'm desperately, madly, inconveniently in love with you."

Those tears that had been sitting back there fell involuntarily.  Ugh, she was the biggest baby.  "Really?"

"Yes!  And I have been since the moment you stood up to those assholes in that jury.  I should have said it months ago.  I should have said it the first moment you invited me to the football game, every Saturday night you sat on that bar-stool, after each of those races, at Thanksgiving, every time we made love, and especially when Marian stormed in.  I should have said it a hundred times."

"I love you, too," she said choked up with tears, and wiped her eyes with the sleeve of his dear hoodie, forgetting about the stage makeup and leaving a huge black streak on the soft, grey fabric.

He reached out for her hands and they each stood awkwardly in the booth, leaning in for a kiss.  As soon as his mouth touched hers, a flood of gratitude hit her and sent a new wave of tears.  He sat down and took a sip of beer with a grimace.  "This is terrible and unworthy of you.  Can we please go?"

"Of course." She left the mug behind and scooted out the door to their vehicles.  He reached out for her and held her tightly, rubbing his face in her neck and whispering her name in her ear.

"Follow me to the apartment?"

"Yes," she said abandoning her rationality and allowing a wide grin to take over her face. And then she stopped.  "Roland? Marian?"

"Marian is staying at her parents.  She got a job at a music store.  Roland goes to Mike and Betty's every weekend. Marian is looking for a place for the two of them.  I have primary custody, but I let her have him for weekends as long as she stays in therapy and makes good choices."  He sighed heavily.  "I hate it.  I miss Friday nights with him.  I miss our Sundays.  Roland is ambivalent about her at best--he missed you terribly, Regina--but it's our compromise."

She took him in her arms this time and held him close.  He kissed her then, and she realized they were both shivering.  "I'll follow you," she said, and got back into her car. They parked in front of his place and climbed the stairs arms wrapped around the other. 

The first thing Regina saw as they entered the apartment was the pumpkin patch picture, framed and on the mantle. She gasped a little "oh," when she saw it, and fell into his arms.  "I've missed you so much.  "I've missed Roland.  It's been awful."

"I'm so sorry," he wrapped his arms around her and picked her up, carrying her to his room.  "I'm so sorry, Regina.  I love you so much," he lay her gently on the bed, and she pulled him on top of her.

"Don't leave me again," she pleaded softly.

"Never," he whispered.


	8. Chapter 8

**July**

 

Regina sat with Henry in uncomfortable chairs outside the county clerk's office.  Her high-heeled silver sandaled foot clattering up and and down.  She checked her phone.  It was ten minutes before their appointment.  He was five minutes late.

"You okay?" Henry asked.  He was wearing a sports coat and an emerald and lilac bow tie she had bought him for the occasion.  He looked impossibly grown up for fifteen years old.

"I'm fine.  I just wish he would get here," her voice betrayed nervousness.  Stop.  Nothing to be nervous about.  She remembered being in these very chairs with Leo years ago.  She banished the thought.

"Here," Henry put his arm around her and held out his phone taking a shot of them.  He passed it to her. She looked beautiful, she thought. Her hair was in soft curls and was partially pulled up in a silver clip.  Her simple white sun dress had a few subtle silver sparkles around the neckline that reflected her eyes.  She looked happy.  She watched Henry label the photo "Me and Grams ;)" and text it to his mother.

"Are you sure she wants to see that?"

"She's happy for you, Regina," he said in full sincerity.  She smiled just as she heard the elevator down the hall ding loudly.

 

She had awoken that Saturday morning months ago clinging to him.  She held him tighter as she regained consciousness and started kissing his chest dreamily, which prompted him to grip her around her middle with one arm, the other laid across her chest.

"Morning, Love," he whispered as he took one of her bare breasts from his hand to his mouth.  His other hand traveled down her body and between her legs, slipping a finger inside her.  She moaned and took in the sensations she had missed.  She rolled onto her back languidly and let him ravish her with his hand and mouth.  She wallowed in the feelings, enjoying every second he ran his tongue all over her.  She held off as long as she could and then came with a loud moan.  She pulled him up and kissed him deeply, tasting herself while grinding in to him. He fucked her with his face in her breasts and made her come again with his hand.  Finally, he gave in himself and came with a delighted moan and shudder.

They laughed about how much they had missed this, and they fell asleep again in each others arms, waking up starving an hour later.  Robin made them tea, scrambled eggs and toast, which they ate in bed before drifting off again.  Regina had been utterly exhausted in every way, she realized and was finally able to sleep contentedly. 

They went another round in the shower with Robin fucking her from behind, and Regina coming with her hands and cheek splayed against the wall. 

"We have many weeks to make up for," he told her with a twinkle in his eye as they were drying off.

"This is why you came back yesterday," she accused him teasingly.

"Not entirely," he protested.

"But..."

"I've been horny for weeks. It's been like being in school again," he pulled her against him with his belly touching her back holding her firmly across the hips and kissing her neck under her wet hair.

She smacked him lightly on the arm and pulled away from his grip.  "I've been miserable for two months, and you've just been down for a fuck?" She pulled a towel firmly around her and gave him a level two Regina Mills death stare.

"Of course not!  I've been a weepy mess.  Come here, Darling..."

"Yeah, good try," she ripped off his towel and snapped him tartly before falling into his arms and swaying with him in the bathroom to an inaudible love song running in both minds.

She ended up racing back to the condo to change clothes and then to the train station to pick up Henry.  She planned to string him along before telling him about the reconciliation, but her face gave her away immediately.  Henry was thrilled for her but reticent.

"I'm going to tell him if he pulls this again, he'll have to deal with me," he said, full of sincere bravado.

"Oh, don't worry, he knows."

They went out for pizza and went back to the condo to play a few rounds of Scrabble before it was time to head back to the school for the final performance.

Henry laughed the whole way back home at her acting skills and her costume, and she made him pay by hugging him tightly and kissing him on both cheeks.

"You've been my rock through all this, Henry.  You're the best person I know."  She took his head in her hands and kissed him on the nose.  Quite mortified, he closed the door and scooted inside.  She chuckled her way back to the pub, and came in to something of a fanfare from Little John and Tuck and a beaming Robin.  Home.

The next morning she cut two miles from her run, and they went out to brunch and started looking at houses in neighborhoods with good elementary schools.  They picked up Roland together, setting off the first in a series of hostile exchanges.  Betty shot Regina a look of sympathy, which made it somewhat better, but Marian was irate at the presence of Regina.

It came to a head in March over spring break, when Regina stayed home with Roland instead of letting Marian have him for a week.  Marian threatened to get a restraining order against Regina, which was a step too far. Robin told her flatly he would sue her for sole custody and cite her abandonment.  He told her she could accept Regina as a part of their lives or choose not to see Roland.  Regina suspected that Marian's parents deserved credit for helping her see reality.  From then on, Marian was chilly but not outright hostile.

On an April Saturday, Regina set another PR in a 10K, and they went out to lunch to celebrate before heading to the pub.  Regina was too filled with adrenaline from the race to notice Robin's nervousness, and thought nothing of it when he took her hand across the table.  He pulled something out and slipped it on her finger.  Regina gasped.  It was a large, round amethyst set in gold and flanked by two small emeralds.  She sucked in another breath.

"Regina..."

"No..." She gasped.

"No?!"

"No!, I don't mean no...no, Robin, sorry, I'm fucking this up..." Regina felt tears welling in her eyes and flashed him her goofiest grin.

He rolled his eyes with a smirk and stated over.

"Regina..."

"Yes!"

"Will you..."

"Yes!"

"Marry me?"

"Yes," she choked back a sob and rose up to throw her arms around him.  "Yes, Robin."  

In May, she sold her condo and they put an offer on an old, rambly house in a decent neighborhood.  They set a wedding date for July, and when the school year came to a successful end, she took three weeks off and over saw renovations, steering Robin away from hiring his buddies and ruling the contractors like a slightly terrifying queen.  She moved her things in and waited impatiently for Robin and Roland's move in date after the wedding.  She set aside a room for Henry and let him help her decorate it.  He arrived the day before the wedding, with a bottle of very good champagne from his parents.  Regina once again gave them much credit. She helped Henry tie his tie with shaky hands and then had to consult _Youtube_ before they got it perfect.

 

The elevator doors opened, and they came tumbling out: Robin and Roland in matching emerald crushed velvet jackets, in spite of the heat.  Robin had a frazzled expression and threw her an apologetic look immediately.  Following them was a older man and woman; the man an older carbon copy of Robin and the woman, plump, with a sweet face and Robin's eyes.  She was carrying a bouquet of lilacs.

"Regina, Henry, this is my mum and dad, Marilyn and Peter. Mum and dad, this is my Regina and her..."

"Best friend and step-grandson, Henry," Regina helped him out.  There were hugs all around, and Marilyn pushed the bouquet into Regina's hands just as they were called into the office.

The actual ceremony was a blur with Henry by Regina, and Roland by Robin, and the Locksleys looking on.  Regina failed at restraining from crying, and Robin teared up, too.  They kissed at the end and embraced for a good thirty seconds, wanting to hold on as long as possible.  Henry took a picture that would sit on their various mantles for the rest of their lives, next to the one from the pumpkin patch.  It was of Robin's back with Regina's arms around him, holding the green and lilac bouquet with a long, purple ribbon dangling down the green velvet of his jacket.  One of Regina's eyes was visible and found Henry as he snapped the picture, and it radiated with love and happiness.

After the ceremony, they headed to the Major Oak, closed to the public and decked out for the affair.  Regina once again marveled at Catherine's brilliance as the whole pub sparkled in green and purple.  As they walked in, a band...Baelfire!?...yes, in deed, broke into a speed metal version of _Let My Love Open the Door_.

Catherine put a ring of lilacs with a little green mesh veil in the back on her head and hugged her, "Congratulations!"

"Thank you for all this!" 

Catherine scurried off to make sure all had drinks, and Regina spotted Emma in a bright purple dress.  The two women embraced.

"You look gorgeous, Regina.  You look perfect.  I'm thrilled for you," Emma told her. 

Regina was beyond words and looked at her friend gratefully as Robin whisked her away to the dance floor where they twirled to the ridiculous, happy music.  Regina caught a glimpse of Henry and Roland in the corner table sorting out Roland's cars and looking at them intently. 

 _My family_ , she thought, and drew in Robin more closely.


End file.
